autism · general stuff

Eighteen

Julie (little Cotton Rabbits)

He may not be able to speak a word, dress himself, understand dangers or resist custard creams.

He may be awake each and every night, badly bite himself when stressed, strip all the beds 5 times a day and put everything he finds on the floor in his mouth.

He may need constant, vigilant supervision just to keep him safe and, due to the severity of his autism, will never be able to live independently, build a career or find a partner to love,

but,

He is one of the worlds truly innocent and gentle souls, free from malice, free from duplicity and wholly loveable and it is my greatest privilege to be his protector, his advocate and his mum,

Happy 18th birthday sweet Toby

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Thank you all so very much for your kind and thoughtful comments, emails and direct messages wishing Toby a happy birthday. He had a lovely afternoon full of the simple pleasures that make him happiest; balloons, cake, lego, sensory toys, curry for dinner, salted caramel ice-cream for pudding and a ‘disco’ in the evening – he likes dancing by himself with the lights off and the disco ball on!

Thank you again for all of your kind good wishes x

 

97 thoughts on “Eighteen”

  5. Toby is so very lucky too Julie.
    Happy 18th birthday Toby, May your day and your life be filled with joy and laughter xxxxx

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  6. And he is a lucky, lovely young man. Hope you all have a wonderful day, especially Toby. Luv from Brenda in Oz xxx

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  7. Happy Birthday sweetheart lots of love from New Zealand, I have a Bichon called Toby and he would love you. Take care. 💖🙏🐕

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  8. Birthday wishes filled with love and dreams and golden thoughts for you, Toby! Happy Birthday to wonderful eighteen year old, who although he will never
    read these greetings knows he is desperately loved by his mum. ❤️❤️🎊🎊❤️❤️

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  15. Happy birthday Toby! Have a lovely day with your amazing Mum and be sure to have some custard creams. Your Mum is so inspiring!

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  21. Happy birthday Toby from Germany! I have been following you now for several years and reading about your stories and experiences has given me a lot of comfort in dealing with my Tobi (yes, almost the same name!),also autistic and turning 24 at the end of this month! My son is speaking, thanks God, at least he can make himself a little bit understood, but it often takes several tries till we understand what he needs…He is and will always be my little big baby, exactly like your son is to you, a grown up man in body, but a little child in thinking and heart…
    Thanks for sharing your stories with us!
    And again happy, happy birthday, may God bless you all!
    Christine from Germany

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  23. Happy 18th Birthday to Toby! May you have custard creams and cake with your loving family. Julie you are amazing, you have my deepest respect for all you do. Enjoy this special time. Sending love and best wishes from Edinburgh. Sandra

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  26. I know it’s a bit late, but happy birthday, Toby!
    May your life will be full of happiness with your family.
    Yumi from Japan

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  31. Love & comfort sent your way across the silvery sea. Some days have been long I am sure but I know the years seem to fly. You both are gifted to have each other. Happy Birth Day to you & Happy Birthday to Toby. May the clutter & busyness of everyday life fall away & may you both have a gentle, happy day.
    ❤️ Lori from Port Perry

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  33. Happy birthday Toby🥳. Hope your day is filled with all the things that make you happy. Julie, you are an amazing woman. We all can learn from Toby and all precious souls like him. In our busy lives we forget how to love unconditionally. You and Toby remind us how to do that.
    Robin in Georgia,USA

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  35. What a lovely post! I hope Toby had a wonderful 18th birthday filled with as many custard creams as he could possibly imagine! xo

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  36. Congratulations on 18 years of love and joy together. Our sons share this day as their birthday and we wish Toby a most splendid day filled With custard creams and laughter. A mother’s love keep the whole world turning.

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  38. Happy birthday Toby from New Zealand. And hugs to your Mum from another Mum whose daughter has never once slept through the night in her 30 years ❤ ❤

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  45. Happy 18th birthday Toby. Hope you have a wonderful time with your lovely family. Thanks for sharing Toby with us Julie. Sue x

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  50. Happy Birthday ! I’ve seen a cake that looks like a giant custard cream in ASDA. Gotta be the one !
    I’ve got a 28yr with the same issues, like you say, stick with what they do offer the world, they are wonderful human beings !

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  56. Another milestone in his jouney through life. Your love shines through in your post. Congratulations to your entire family.

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  59. Happy birthday Toby, I can’t believe that you are 18 already. I was with Lucy Locket at the wekend and your name was mentioned a few times Julie xx

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  60. Happy Birthday Toby! I’ve been watching you grow up surrounded by the love and devotion of your dear family…Love to you, too, Mum with your very own sweet Angel here on earth!!!

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  62. Happy birthday Toby. I love the photo with you just behind him Julie. It’s appropriate because we have a saying in The US, I have your back, meaning I’m behind you all the way, supporting you and looking out for you. You and your husband so clearly have Toby’s back. Hope his day is filled with joy. I know it will be filled with love.

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  64. Happy Birthday Dear Sweet Toby!! 🎂🎁🎈 What a wonderful milestone! My love, thoughts and prayers are with you and your Dear Mum and Family!! I am the Mummy, and Full-time Carer, for two precious Daughters with High Functioning Autism, so our experiences are different, but our Blessings are similar!! 💐

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  66. We should all be so loved!! He’s lucky to have you and you to have him as well. The biggest of celebrations on this huge milestone. Happy Birthday Toby!

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  68. A very happy birthday to Toby! Blessings to Mum/Dad – it takes special people to care for another human being and it sounds like you’re doing a fantastic shop of it. . . . .

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  77. The number of comments to this post shows just how much you are thought of, both for your beautiful knitting and being such a loving, selfless mum. Belated happy birthday Toby and best wishes for the future to all the family – you truly deserve the very best care and support.

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  80. Happy belated birthday Toby from England .. may you continue to always be happy and surrounded by love and custard creams xxx what a wonderful mummy you have .. may we all aspire to give our children such a happy loving safe upbringing as you are blessed with xxx

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  81. It’s been a privilege for us too to hear about Toby over the years.
    I do hope he enjoyed his day – a lucky boy to have you for his mum.

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  82. Happy belated Birthday, dear Toby and Mum – I wish you all the best which is possible! And God bless you and your familiy!

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  84. I just wanted to wish Toby a happy birthday! I also wanted to tell you that I admire your strength as a mom. I can only imagine how much dedication, love and patience you put in everyday. I’ve been reading your blog for a few years now and I love your work! You make the sweetest little toys! I simply wish you all the best, always to you and your family. I told myself that I was going to buy one of your toys when I had a baby… now I finally have one so I might have to have one of your toys.. lol

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  86. You are e great mom. I wishe you all the best for you and yours family and e lot of power, patience and hope for every days. God bless you!

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  89. Every child is a gift from God and you understand that. May He give you patience on your most trying days and shower you with blessings every day.

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  90. Happy 18th Birthday to your Toby! He is so lucky to have a such a wonderful Mum!!! What wonderful pictures of your sweet son! ❤

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  91. I hope Toby had a wonderful day! I confess that I cried when I read the post Julie; your words were so humbling and powerful at the same time. You give so much of yourself and we are grateful to share it. Thanks for the patterns and the photographs and the inspiration and your time: it’s all greatly appreciated.

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  93. Awww Julie, you made me cry. I LOVE LOVE that picture in the bottom right corner — there Toby is, with his sweet mother keeping an eye out for him. You are an amazing mother and Toby is so lucky to have you. Happy Happy Birthday to adorable, smiling Toby. Thank you for sharing him with us!

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  94. Somehow I missed this point and saw mention of it in your gorgeous fungi post. Happy birthday to your sweet Toby! I’ve been following you for years and it is just nuts that he is 18 already! 😀

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  95. So happy Toby had a wonderful birthday, his lovely handsome face says it all Julie he looks so happy. .
    Thank you so much for sharing beautiful pictures of your woodland walk, goodness what beautiful fungi pics. It is so nice just to switch off and take
    Yourself away to the woods, love it.
    Also the pics of Toby just wonderful.
    Thank you for keeping us all up to date even with your busy busy life.
    Hope your daughter doing well at Uni.
    Take care
    Hugs
    Ellie xxxx

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  96. it’s been a while since I last found your blog.I am amazed at how Toby has grown. I am glad he had a lovely birthday. He has such a happy and kind face and I send congratulations to you all.x

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