It's school half term break here – it hardly feels like enough time has passed since the Easter break and I'm not at all prepared.
Luckily both Toby and I share a love of quiet, woodland places and since he's so hard to entertain at the best of times, we'll be having a daily jaunt to the woods to help keep him occupied.
We walk along in silence, enjoying the sounds of the birds and the wind in the leaves and sometimes we get rewarded for our quiet strolling by a glimpse of a deer or a fox. Toby has a favourite wood walk with ancient contorted trees (a legacy of coppicing) and a brook running through the centre.
It also has Ermine Street, an ancient Roman road running through it and I like to think of all of the people who have passed this way through the ages, apparently including William the Conqueror and Oliver Cromwell and now Master Toby…
Toby usually loves paddling in the brook (and occasionally peeing in it!) but at the moment it's completely dry thanks to the lack of spring rain.
Despite that everything is verdant and cool and so very peaceful. I hope that peace will keep us company the rest of this week as we're still waiting to hear about dates for respite care and Toby has been particularly unmanageable over the last few weeks. Hopefully the woods will work their magic on him and help to keep him calm, he usually is when we're there.
I love this picture of him strolling along ahead of me, he looks for all the world like any other nine year old boy. Seeing him like this does me the power of good!
I won't be back this week but hope to be back with some knitting updates next week. Hope you have a peaceful week where you are and thanks for dropping in to visit.
little cotton rabbits 
hey gorgeous, keeping my fingers crossed that you have a more peaceful time this week….loving the pics! ;o)
hugs
hello gorgeous xxx
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Oh now that looks like such a gorgeous place I’m not surprised it has a calming effect on him . I have a little someone who drops his pants absolutely anywhere when the need for a pee takes over too ,sometimes in the most inappropriate places lol. Hopefully you get some good news soon , enjoy the rest of your week x
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Hi Julie,
I’ve been an ardent follower of your blog for 6 months or so and I have yet to post a comment. It is easy for me to share my thoughts on your knitting but whenever you post about your son, I am at a lost for words.
But after reading this post I couldn’t help myself from typing in this comment box. I am 22 years old and haven’t really met a person with autism, but I know how I should react and care for such a person all because of your writing.
People with autism may cause a lot of personal and physical stress for the caregiver, but there are times when you can see glimpses of an ordinary person. Such like during a walk through the woods. When it happens, it is like God is showing you a bit of heaven. He’s giving you a glimpse of what is to come because of the love and care you showed one of His children.
Very few people in this world are able to do what you are doing and I commend you!
I will keep you and your family in my prayers!
Rebekah
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hang on in there Julie- you will get respite care!
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I hope you hear soon about dates for respite soon but those pics emanate peace.
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Lovely photos Julie. I hope you all have a happy, peaceful half term break, and that you get some good news about respite care very soon.
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This looks such a beautiful place, no wonder it works it’s magic on him. I hope you have a reasonably peaceful week with lots of lovely walks
Jackie x
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Your woodland walk looks very therapeutic. Toby looks like he’s loving it and taking it all in..
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Hi Julie.
It looks so peaceful there, a perfect place for Toby to explore. Those trees are amazing – does Toby try to climb them?
I have followed your blog for a few years now and I can’t believe how much Toby has grown. It must make managing him more difficult. I hope you hear about the respite soon and that it gives you and Amy some quality time together and to catch up on some precious sleep.
Wishing you some peaceful and relaxing moments over half-term.
Becky x
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It’s lovely that you and Toby have a ‘special’ place where you can enjoy each other and your surroundings and most importantly somewhere that gives you both peace.
Hope your week is peaceful too.
Vivienne x
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I know what you mean when you come across photos of our children and they look, “normal”.
I love the photo of Toby looking up in the trees. The way he is holding his hands and the tilt of his head. I don’t know, it just touched me.
I pray you receive some much needed peace my friend. The thing that is so hard is that we know they act like this because they don’t feel right! They aren’t naughty children….. and that breaks my heart. I wish I could make things right in their little worlds so they feel at peace and right with themselves.
🙂 Thanks for taking us on this stroll with you and Toby. There is a little boy in Levi’s class who is severely autistic and if I could, I’d kidnapp him and bring him home with me. He can’t stand being hugged but I can’t help myself. Everytime I see him, I give him a big hug. The last time I did, a necklace with a large silver round pendent that I wear fell out of my shirt and started to sway back and forth in front of him. He was mezmerized. He grabbed my necklace and started to rub the pendent. I think he’d have sat there all day doing that if my back would have allowed me bending over to reach him.
I love these kids. They are difficult by my heart just bursts with love for them….
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Nothing like a walk in the woods for a bit of freedom and escapism, my son too loves being in the thick of a forest. What a great mum you are to focus on the positive and cherish these moments.
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Hi Julie, thank you for such a beautiful post, the woods look stunning and I can see why Toby loves them so much.
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I look forward to your return next week, after what I hope will be a peaceful time for you.
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It’s amazing how natre can restore what life strips away from us, wishing you a blessed and peaceful week and some good news about respite care xox
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Make the most of every peaceful moment. ‘what is life if full of care we haven’t time to stand and stare’ Time to stand and stare is a rare gift. Enjoy each second. Much love.
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Wishing you a peaceful week Julie.
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I love reading your blog — and always look forward to new postings. My life is crazy, so those few minutes I can get aways from my craziness — the better I feel. All the best with Toby.
Deb
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Julie you are the most awesome mom ever……..full of strength and courage. Toby is ‘normal’, just as God created him to be as Toby……and you have the awesome life of being his mom. You have shown everyone what is it to have strength and grace. Thank you for that………
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Hi Julie
Loving the photos, I too am looking for a little peace in what have been difficult times so tomorrow I am off to Padstow in Cornwall (someone’s favourite place) for a couple of days with my best friend Sue.
Take care
love
Davina x
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I read this yesterday, and thought I had written something. Thus, I see how muddled my brain is. The order of nature (not man’s order, but the order of the over-all design), when nature is at rest and not raging, flows around us as we pass through it, and perhaps even passes through us. We human beings, with our willful and self-directed lives, we are the anomaly. We strain the fabric of things with our erratic energies and intentions. We stiffen what should flow. We shape the lives of other things according to our own desires.
You walked in silence.
I would not have been able to do it. I don’t know how to be silent. And so, quite often, I am the anomaly. Toby’s energies, erratically managed by a brain that rages against itself, still must be more responsive to the patterns of creation than mine is. ANd there is enough room outside for all of what shoots off of him to dissipate – it doesn’t bounce back in his face the way it will off walls and close faces, and walls of human noise. The relief from that pressure must be wonderful to him.
WHich is what his mother knows. ANd why she takes him there.
Wonderful, tired mama.
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Love the last photo! He looks just like how I imagine Christopher Robin. Enjoy your holiday tiddley pom!
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When I pray for peace. I think of you. God gave you Toby for a reason and although he cannot tell you he is enabled by you each day of his life. Balance, Peace, Grace be with you Julie. You are loved and admired by so many people. Blessing to Amy as well.
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Hi, I love your blog and I’ve just nominated you for a Kreativ Blogger Award. Details on my blog.
S x
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Julie,
I love the pictures of Toby. He looks like he knows this walk by heart and is checking each object along the way to see that all is in it’s proper place and growing well – like a scientist!
I hope you get your respite soon. Take care all.
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There’s a special sort of peace to be found in the woods – hope you and Toby manage to take a little home with you.
Because you’re right – half term has arrived much sooner after Easter than I’d expected too.
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Lovely pics Toby looks like he is having a really good time – I hope that this week goes ok for you.
Take care.
Alison x
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Hi Julie,
Wonderful photo’s of a very happy little boy. You can almost sense the tanquil nature of the walk. Hope you all have a good weeks holiday.
B x
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Hi there,
My son (now grown up) has Aspergers and learning disabilities and I remember well the early mornings and the struggle to keep him occupied through the day – every one felt about 5 times longer than it actually was! (I don’t think the school ever realised how an unscheduled snow day could throw me into despair and I just ended up feeling like a bad mum a lot of the time.) Hope this week goes well for you and the woodland walks work their magic.
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I’ve been told that peeing au naturel… it’s the best feeling in the world!
(what a peaceful place)
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Your woodland is so beautiful. Thanks for the link to coppicing — I learned something new today! Good Luck with half term — I hope the weather stays beautiful so you can spend lots of time outdoors.
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I love your photos of Toby. J used to love visiting the woods when he was younger, it used to take us hours as he had to keep walking backwards and forwards over certain bits, but it was lovely to be outside with him…he is having real trouble getting out of the house at the moment. I hope you have a peaceful week xxx
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I love that last photo of Toby. I hope it’s a good week for you with some helpful news about respite care. Take care!
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What a lovely post. I’m glad that the woods have a calming effect on your son – something simple and natural. I admire your strength and commitment enormously and am glad that you are able to take some time for yourself when he is at school. It’s sometimes hard to remember to look after yourself when you are a carer as you are. Well done.
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It’s sunny here after four weeks of rain, so we can join you in summer at last!
I have a male friend who swears that when his feet are wet he has to pee…
Hope your week is going steadily and that you hear about the respite soon. There’s a respite home on my road, it’s a lovely place.
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Hi Julie
I just think you are one amazing mother and I truly admire you.
Have a beautiful week.
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…most lovely pictures, Julie…(following from the US) Hugs! – roni
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Wow, a picture of you too Julie! So pleased to put a face to the posts. Yours is truly an inspirational blog and my week isn’t complete without a visit 🙂
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Just looking at those photos has a calming effect. Beautiful!
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You are an amazing example!! I love that you have also added a personal picture to your side bar!! I love to put a face w/ the words!
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Hi Julie,
I hope things will calm down this week as school and routines start back. I will keep everything crossed that respite works out for you as we have now lost the little we had. Take a deep breath and remember how special and amazing you are. Hugs x
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Back to school now, and back to a routine. I really enjoy your blog, as it is about real life, I have given you a ‘Versatile Blog’ award. Have a rest now!
Jo x
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