I've been reading blogs for 6 years now and I thoroughly enjoy it. I'm especially drawn to creative blogs as I love the mix of real life and crafting that makes each of my favourite blogs personal and unique. I've never though felt the need to leave any unkind or callous comments anywhere – it seems un-necessary because if you come across a post you don't agree with you can simply click out and visit somewhere else, after all reading a blog or leaving a comment isn't compulsory is it?
I wonder then what compels someone to reach out with bitterness and leave a spiteful comment like the one left for me last week? I think I'd have felt rather ashamed at having written something like that in the attempt to shovel a little meanness into someone else's day. My personal view is that such comments always reflect far more badly on the commenter than the person that they're aimed at.
Anyway, let's not dwell on the crappy side of blogging.
Here I've been feeling foxy, although I still haven't managed to knit a whole one – I seem stuck on heads but the bodies will no doubt follow along. I'm feeling impulsive in my knitting at the moment and I think it's something to do with having that lovely new yarn to try out – it's hard to leave it just sitting there waiting to be used!
On the Toby front much is unchanged but I'm filling in lots of charts about sleep patterns, ABC behaviour charts to record and analyse his frequent meltdowns and lists of what worked to calm him at a particular time. This will all help in an upcoming meeting with the educational psychologist and it makes me feel better too because I feel like I'm doing something positive to help him.
I'm signing off for a week or so as next week is half term break. Hopefully when I come back spring will have sprung and I'll find you all feeling happy and frisky! Have a good week all!
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*An 'ABC' chart can be used to record behavioural concerns. 'A' stands for antecedents, ie what occurs immediately before a behavioural outburst and can include any triggers, signs of distress or environmental information. The 'B' refers to the behaviour itself and is a description of what actually happened during the outburst or what the behaviour 'looked' like. The 'C' refers to the consequences of the behaviour, or what happened immediately after the behaviour. It can also include information regarding other people's responses to the behaviour and the eventual outcome for the individual. In addition, it’s a good idea to keep track of where and when the behaviour occurred to assist in identifying any patterns.
little cotton rabbits 
How spooky! I was just writing you an email to see you if you were ok, after your last post. I’m so glad to see you back Julie :o)
Your response to your commenter is absolutely spot-on. Well done you!
Those little fox heads are adorable and I can’t wait to see them complete with bodies!
Beautiful photo of your lovely boy – he’s very lucky to have you as his Mum. I hope you have a peaceful half-term.
lots of love
Lesley xxx
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Some people are just born to be mean – ignore them. your blog is lovely and always makes my day to read it.
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Hope you can rise above such a nasty and mean spirited comment Julie. Perhaps “Fred” should try living with a child on the autistic spectrum for a week and see if he changes his tune. As for me, I always find your blog a pleasure to read and very positive given that I’m sure that life is probably far from rosy. Hope you have a happy and calm half term.
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What a lovely photo of Toby. I’m glad you’re finding positive ways to chart your progress – hope the meeting(s) go well! Hope half term is as relaxing as you could hope for.
I admire your grace in dealing with your unnecessary comment. We all have bad days and find blog posts that annoy us, but it’s better to keep it ourselves, perhaps. I’m sure it was very hurtful to you though, and I am sorry you had to read it.
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I would have said….”if you haven’t anything nice to say then say nothing at all!”.
As you rightly say if you don’t agree with what you are reading then you don’t have to read it and can simply click a box to shut it. We all blog for different reasons and if at times you need to air off a little [and I’m sure there are times when we all do] then this is your space and there are lots of caring folk who will support and say all the right things to help. Ignore spiteful comments and please keep doing what you are doing.
Love the foxy faces 🙂
hugs,
A x
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I’d cheerfully punch ‘Fred’ on the nose. But like you said – more about them than about you. The view from the moral high ground is so much more pleasant, don’t you find?
Hope half term goes smoothly – perhaps the change in routine might nudge Toby out of his current pattern.
And Julie, you are a star and don’t let anyone make you doubt it for a second.
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I’m appalled at that commenter despite the fact that life can be difficult for you Julie, you always post in an upbeat manner, always seeking the positive! You do right to rise above it you’re obviously the better person!
What a gorgeous collection of little foxes! 🙂
Whether it’s the big or small things in life, I find writing things down is always helpful. Beautiful photo of Toby!
Vivienne x
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I agree with what everyone has said so far. It’s your blog and you can put on it whatever you want! I never make assumptions about someone’s affluence etc based on a blog- surely we all want to show the good bits of our lives in photos?!? Speaking of which, love the picture of Toby…
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Julie, I am a reader but do not frequently comment. I commend you on how you handle the comment left the other day. It would have been so easy to hit the “delete” button but I think this may have only spurred the person on further. Enough with that. The foxes are already so beautiful. I can’t wait to see them all finished. Sending good vibes your way, tara.
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I’m always bemused (and aggravated!) by people who go to a blog subtitled “knitting and living with an autistic son” and then get huffy because the blogger talks about some of the difficulties of living with an autistic son.
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Hope you have a nice week and hopefully Toby will get back on ‘normal’ track soon (nice photo of him but it made me sad to see the dark color around his eyes).
Love your foxes (to be) and I must say that I like your blog very much 🙂
I am still wondering about that comment this ‘Fred’ left as I have never felt any privilege in having a child with autism. But maybe I am missing something.
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Have a happy and fun half-term Julie. Fred’s comments say everything about him/herself, and are no reflection on you and the graceful way you share your life and it’s challenges on your blog.
xox
Diana
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I’m with Ali and would happily punch “Fred” on the nose for you but I’m so glad you haven’t let the nasty comments get the better of you – you are right that it shows so much more about their unpleasant character. Hope you have a peaceful half term and find time to do lots more foxy knitting! Lucy xx
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I would definitely not take Fred’s comments to heart! He definitely has issues to be so mean spirited. I am an extremely busy mom and don’t have time to blog or read blogs. Your blog is the only one I follow because I love to check up on your creative ideas, beautiful photos, and most of all amazing animals – esp. bunnies 🙂 You have such a positive and upbeat attitude raising your son which I so admire! With such a huge number of enthusiastic blog followers, I would not give “Fred” a second thought!! ((Hugs)) Susan
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I just wanted to thank you for your blog, I really enjoy reading it. I found it through knitting but I also have a son on the Autistic Spectrum though not high end. We struggle as a family at times but like you always see the positives first. Although I do not comment Toby is regulally in my thoughts along with how you are coping. I hope half term is calm and fun.
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I never get the sense that you are complaining, one of my loveliest friends has 2 severely autistic boys and although she is the happiest loveliest person I have ever met I know life is really hard for her, so although I don’t know what it’s like I get some sense of the difficulties you face every day, and I have to say reading your blog has given me a much better understanding of what she is going through too, I think I first found your site because of a tiny rabbit knitting pattern, I have been a regular ever since. Although I don’t often leave a comment I really appreciate your lovely creations and the education about autism. I’m sorry I’m not very good at getting out what I want to say and I know we have never met but I do genuinely care about you, Toby and your lovely family. Quite frankly and deeply saddened by that comment.
On a much lighter note the foxes are soooo lovely xxxx
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Meant that comment to read I am deeply saddened not and ( i’m useless) x
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Some people hey?! If I don’t like something, like you say, I just click the little cross in the corner! No need to make someone feel rubbish just because you don’t agree with them…
Anyway, I’m glad you’re feeling more positive about things and those fox heads look super cute!
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I never had the feeling that you complained because you like to complain. I think you’re great at keeping hope !
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Well said Julie. Last week’s commenter really bothered me a lot and I got as far as drafting out a comment in reply but then thought it would probably spur him on – he obviously got off on coming back here to see how many feathers he’d ruffled.
When I was training to be a SENCO, one thing stuck in my mind and that was the advice to ‘never judge the parent of a special needs child’. It is so true – you don’t know what that person has to deal with at home or when you don’t see them – being the parent of a SEN child myself, I know we put on a brave face in public. The last thing you need is someone ignorant telling you how to feel!
Can’t wait to see the completed foxes – I’m planning a knitted faux-fox stole so must see what yarn you have been using!
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Love the little fox heads, your knitting is so gorgeous, can’t wait to see the rest!!! Hope things are getting better for your little one. Have a good week off and take care!
Hugs,
Margaret B
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Wow. I’m so sorry Julie — some people just don’t get it. You did so well to face it head on — I’m always such a chicken, I would have probably just deleted the comment and pretended it never happened. You’re my idol!
Have a lovely break. Love the picture of your sweet boy!
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Hi Jules,
All I can say re Fred’s comment – get a life and clear off out of our lovely little blog.
There, nuff said!
Have a great week off with the little folks and hopefully it will not be to distruptive to the routine.
See you in a week (so to speak)
Much love and very kind thoughts coming your way.
B x
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Oh those are the cutest things ever. You have an amazing talent. Hugs!
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Can’t believe people will make such negative comment – I’m definitely in the ‘if you can’t say anything nice, say nothing at all’ camp. Lovely little foxes, Julie.
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Hi there, sorry to hear someone has been so mean to you. I can’t believe that someone could be so rude to you on YOUR blog!!!! If you want to rant and rave on your blog you go ahead and do what it takes to make you feel better, it is your blog and you can write what you like! If someone doesn’t like it then they shouldn’t be reading it, and especially not commenting on it! I love your blog. I made one of your little rabbits from the free pattern the other week. I forgot to take a photo of it though. My son wants one too! Keep smiling x
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Just ignore the person who posted that, they obviously like to go on blogs and complain what a life they lead. I only work with autistic children so leave my work behind when i leave work, so can totally understand you feeling down and tired at times, but believe me you do a wonderful job and i love your blog it brightens my days and you were the one who inspired me to start knitting again as a way of relaxing after a difficult day at work. So keep up the good work and try and enjoy your half term.
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Life is sometimes hard. Everyone knows that. I love that you share so candidly and I really love that you try so hard to be a good mother to BOTH of your children. I love reading about your trials. I know that might sound odd, but I always learn a powerful lesson or a poignant reminder that we must take courage and just put one foot in front of the other each day. Thank you for sharin your thoughts with us. Yarn or otherwise.
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I’ve read your blog for awhile now, and never commented, but I wanted to tell you I don’t think you complain. You’re just sharing your life and 99.9% of us who read your blog are thankful you do. I’m sure you are a help others who have autistic children. And you knit the most lovely things. Thanks for sharing!
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Can’t believe that someone would write such a comment! What an unhappy life they must lead. You are an inspiration, and I think of you often.
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Julie – I never comment on blogs probably because I don’t think my comments are as important as what I read form others but “fred” has me so fired up I have to write! First of all your response to that negative comment shows nothing but grace and kindness. You are a gem. Second of all, no one knows what “privilege” life grants unless you “walk a mile in their shoes”. What you have done with Toby and how patiently you work with him(although I bet you don’t think so at times) is beautiful to watch. Kudos to your daughter too….I have an adult sister with Down Syndrome and I know what it is like to be the sister of a disabled sibling. Sure my sister is loving and kind but she is also a lot of work. I wouldn’t trade her for anything because she has taught me so much about life. It is however a daily struggle and a lot of work and she does NOT have any of the difficult issues you face with Toby. I feel VERY sorry for “fred”, so bitter and sad. He/she must have some deep, difficult, unresolved issues – and must be very unhappy. I celebrate the joy you bring to blogging and anxiously watch Toby’s developments. And …. I can’t wait to see the foxes! Keep up the good work and enjoy the school break.
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I’m so sorry about the nasty comment you had to endure. I’ve always so admired your courage and strength and how you cope by letting your creativity shine through. A bloger is kind enough to open a window into their everyday life. Anyone looking in should be grateful to catch a glimpse. Blessings to you and your family. P.S. The fox heads are wonderful.
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That comment from ‘fred’ was completely unnecessary! But good on you for taking it the way you are, I would have probably been a lot less diplomatic. I am the same as a few people here, I read your blog regularly and really enjoy it, but don’t really leave comments. I’ve never felt that you were complaining or dwell on things, I always get the impression that you are trying really hard to improve things and look on the bright side of everything! Have a good weekend, Julie!
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You are perhaps, one of the strongest women I “know”. I admire you and your family.
I also am madly in love with your foxes. For every Fred out there, there are at least 10 of us, cheering you on and admiring all you do.
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Unbelievable that anyone would go out of their way to leave a spiteful comment. I read your blog and feel very inspired by your positive approach to toby’s condition. I think you sound like a wonderful caring mum who only wants the best for your children and I really admire your courage. I still don’t know how you find the time to create such beautiful creatures. I
look at Tate everyday living on my mantlepiece and think how clever you are. Keep calm and carry on.
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Good grief! I’m so sorry someone would leave such a nasty comment. Possibly someone who is seeking attention.
Ah well, your posts are always fun and interesting. I’m loving the foxes already. I can’t wait for the final result.
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Blogging is about shared experiences and aspirations. Your life challenges and how you overcome them are possibly helping a lot of folk. Fred can b****r off!
Love the foxes by the way, hope they’ll be in your Etsy shop when they are ready.
Cissie
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what a mean and ignorant comment to leave on your blog!! I know it’s so hard to push stuff like that out of your head, but I guarantee that its from a small minded, bitter individual who apparently does not regularly read your blog at all. Those foxes are looking so charming already, and that is a lovely photo of Toby.
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Oh so sorry to hear about this nasty experience. What an utter nasty person. I met a really nasty blogger at a vintage fair who has been really unpleasant to me. They can only be jealous!!!
I hope your meeting goes well. Best wishes to you and all you family.
LOVE the fox heads.
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Oh my heck! Oh my heck! Oh my heck!!! Gnashing of teeth. Let me at ’em!! Dear Fred, (Boy could I give him an earful.)
Thankfully, you have so many readers who love and support you.
Living the day to day grind that parents do with kids with special needs, believe me, Fred has no idea how much you COULD complain and grumble if you wished….. but you don’t. Even on your hard days, you tell it to us diplomatically. It is what it is.
Filling those ABC charts in takes a lot of effort! I hope it helps so you can get on top of things. Bless Toby. I look at the photo of him and my heart just fills up with so much love for him.
Honestly! I do NOT know where FRED gets off saying what he did……..
Grrrr. What a small sad little world he must be confined to…..
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OMG Julie what a horrible comment to leave you. I often think about you for days after you have left a blog when things have been getting you down. There are some really mean and unfeeling people in this world.
I
m looking forward to seeing foxy when its finished.Take care and hope you enjoy half term.
Love Carole in Rossendale xxxx
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I cannot believe what “fred” wrote!!We have friends with a son who is autistic and I know how difficult life is 24/7.You do not come across as complaining at all but as a wonderful caring mother who copes magnificantly with what is undoubtably a tough time.Well done to you Julie and just ignore fred.He’s the one with the problems.
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Julie, I love your blog and never think you are moaning. I love reading about your family and how you cope with day to day things that many of us take for granted. I love seeing what you are knitting and it was in fact your blog that inspired me to learn how to knit a couple of years ago. Some people feel the need to put other people down to make themselves feel better. I would not take any notice at all. Continue what your doing Julie because you are an inspiration to us all. Have a lovely half term
Emma xxx
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Goodness what a needless comment to leave you, hurtful and inaccurate. You always come over as a Mum doing her best with love, realistic and caring. Never as complaining. We all take pleasure in small things in our lives, knitting, growing vegetables, time spent dancing in the fountains as we all have worries and cares too. But who would be arrogant enough to judge another parent. Keep on keeping on.xx
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I love the photo of Toby! I hope your week goes well xx
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i was horrified when i read ‘that’ comment – i think your post today regarding said comment is spot on. I love reading your posts and seeing what gorgeousness you are knitting. I hope you have a lovely half term.
xxx
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Hi
I’ve been following you for a while now and haven’t felt the need to leave a comment, but just wanted to add my support on this issue. I do believe in free speach, but this just is not the right forum for that sort of comment. I can only assume that the person that left the comment thinks that they have been dealt a rough hand and has decided to take that out on you. Perhaps they don’t realise how brave and generous you are to open your heart to strangers and share some very personal experiences. Maybe they will read some of these comments and find a more positive way of dealing with their issues in future. I love your blog and I am very inspired by your creativity. Best wishes. Bx
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I guess it’s like when you go shopping and are served by someone rude (although this was alot more personal) thats just the way some people are. That little thing called Karma will come back and bite them. You are an amazing woman Julie and don’t ever doubt it. Obviously this person has no idea what you and your family cope with everyday xxBrenda
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I think all the lovely comments here on this post are a true representation of how people really feel about you!! Good on you for not letting that one annoying comment bother you too much.
Parenthood is hard work… to then add autism into the mix… you’re doing a great job and I think it’s pretty normal to feel like sharing a bit here and there about how things are going and your thoughts and feelings.
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It’s so baffling that such a comment was left for you – anyone with an inch of understanding would realise how hard things must be for you all at the moment. I am always blown away with the stoic and hugely creative way in which you deal with the difficulties you all face. I hope all these good good comments have helped to banish any negative feeling from the one unpleasant one. That picture of Toby is lovely.
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Holy crap, that’s just plain horrible. I love reading your blog, all the good and the bad. It lets me know that other people have tough days too(if for different reasons), and there’s always so much hope it can be quite inspiring.
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Caroline B posted earlier and I love what she was taught. You just never know what someone elses life looks like right now. Havent we all put on the fake smile and made sure everything looks “just so” before heading out the door? I love the adorable knits and whimsy. you have a beautiful way of sharing. Keep up the good work!
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Julie – I’m so sorry that someone felt you were a target for them to lash out at! Just remember, the words that come from a person’s mouth represent the condition of their heart. This person has a very sad, uncaring and unloving heart and I feel so sorry for “them” but not you. God gives us challenges in life to grow and learn how to be compassionate and loving to all people, even those who are challenged physically, mentally or emotionally. He loves us all and we are all beaugiful in His eyes…just as Toby is precious in your eyes. What a wonderful mom you must be…your grace speaks volumes for the condition of your heart! There will always be mean spirited people…I will pray for this person that they find real love and happiness like you have. 🙂 PS. My daughter and I LOVE your blog and it also inspired us to read Lucy’s Attic 24- which has my daugher “hooked” on crocheting. Will you ever have a pattern for your lovely bunnies???? PLEASE!!!!
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Julie, I think you have every right to feel affronted by the totally callous and uncaring comment made by “Fred”. I regularly read your ‘column’ and I totally emphathise with what you have to say about the strain your little boy’s autism has on your family. | don’t think you are complaining at all, simply telling people how it is. It must be incredibly difficult for you and your family – yes you do have a lovely home and veg patch but how can that possibly compensate for what you have to go through – it just keeps a bit of normality in your life. My husband was in a very serious car accident 12 months ago and although appears normal to the outside world has been left with a head injury which gives him pain and and fatigue every day – a lot of people do not understand our situation – so I completely understand how you feel. Just ignore this insensitive person and carry on as you are.
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Your blog is one of my fave’s and it is a pleasure reading your blog. I really like your creativity and enjoy seeing what you have made.
Leah x 🙂
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Poor Fred’s reading a different blog to the rest of us, I think. Your posts always temper the positive along with the trials you face. When it rains, you look for the rainbow and I think that’s why so many people get so much pleasure from following your blog.
It’s only through blogs like yours that people like me get to learn about what it’s really like to live with an autistic child; this isn’t a chapter in a medical encyclopedia, it’s the real life difficulties that parents face. And raising awareness can only be a positive thing.
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Some people have too much time on their hands to spread their low moods.
Loving the look and colour of the foxes
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I left a really, really long comment on the wooly post you linked to – wish I’d left it here. It’s about ALL THESE COMMENTERS who are saying such cheering and wonderful things and some philosophical thoughts on the phenomenon of blogging in general. As usual, it’s quite brilliant (:oP) and as usual, no one will read it because i”m late putting it up (had a wedding today). I an crowing over all these kind things, and all these women who think their comments aren’t needed. But here they are, shoulder to shoulder when the chips are down – and it ONLY it were that way over all the things in the world, we’d not be in such a planetary quandary all the time.
I hope the week goes well. Be careful, please. And fox heads – how I love them – as opposed to the fox tails I have to dig off my puppies and horses.
You are a little jewel, my girl. And I’m so impressed at how you fix yourself to courage and do everything you can for your beloved little boy – and for your beloved little girl, and your good man.
Light the heavens, and break open the cabinet doors of our spring storage – let the colors flow and the flowers break into singing. Let the foxes have bodies and the hopes have wings.
These comments are like a dance.
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Ooooh, I love those tricky little foxes! Their white muzzles are stunning.
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I rarely leave comments but do enjoy your sweet knitted creatures. I agree with the post that suggest Fred should live with a child with ASD. What a beautiful photo of Toby and how lucky he is to have you for his Mom. I think you are amazing and I hope you are able to find some strategies that help all of you. In the meantime, keep knitting.
Nebraska Knitter
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What a beautiful, peaceful picture of your boy. Definitely one to treasure.
Hope your down time is restorative.
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Hugs for you. I love your blog and your creations and your generosity. I think of you often throughout my days and hope you are all doing well.
I too have encountered blog comment meanness. I’m a homeschooling mom of 8 and once had someone tell me how dare I complain about how hard it is sometimes, when I was simply stating the fact of how difficult bearing the educational responsibility for 8 young lives can be. Oy. When one is being transparent and real, it doesn’t necessarily follow that one is complaining.
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I can’t believe that someone can be so unkind. I was always told “is you don’t have something nice to say – shut-up”!!
I have never thought of your blog at complaining, rather that I see it as enlightening us on living with a child with special needs.
Please keep on blogging just as you are, it fills the rest of us with hope and joy with your wonderful creativity!
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Hi, I don’t always leave comments but I’ve been reading blogs for more than a year now and even started mine. For sure you don’t deserve a comment like that. I am not a mother yet and I admire all the mothers that take care of their children, work and they find time to blog! I can’t understand why somebody would waste time to write something like that, maybe he/she commented on the wrong blog? 🙂
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There once was a blogger called fred
Who got out the wrong side of bed!
Leave him alone
To grumble and moan
And think of your pals here instead!
Hope you have a good week and look forward to your (foxy) return.
xx
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Oh Julie, I’m so sorry that on top of everything someone has decided to be so judgmental and mean. I do wonder whether this person, whom I doubt very much has even volunteered his real name, is perhaps just trying to be controversial and is indeed getting a twisted kick about the furious comments that have ensued. I think you are so brave to rise above it. I’d like to put a bat up his nightdress, but that’s just me! Fab foxes by the way!
Pen x
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Just ignore that commentator. No-one but you knows how hard your life is. I really enjoy reading your blog and looking at your creations, and my heart goes out to you and your family when I read you are having a hard time. Parenthood is hard enough, but you have the added issues of Toby’s condition. You just keep on blogging the way you are and we will all keep on reading.
Dawn xx
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Have a good half term…hope the weather warms a little so you can get out and about with the kids.
Take care and as for that comment…well, I think that’s what the delete key was made for :o) It’s what I do to spammer comments and this one as far as I’m concern is in the same boat!
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There are some mean people in the world. Ignore. Hope you have a lovely half-term, and that it isn’t too stressful for Toby. Hope Amy has lots of fun too.
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Those foxes look gorgeous as always. I’m working on foxes too – but they’ll never be the same standard as yours LOL. Forget Fred – what a loser (as my teenage daughter would say). I often read forum posts on various sites and totally disagree with what’s being said BUT I just click away and don’t get involved as I would never want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Perhaps Fred’s just seeking attention. Anyway I love your blog posts – they always cheer me up and you photos are fab. Keep up the good work and I hope your hard work with Toby leads to some improvements. Have a lovely half term, Lynne xx
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hello Julie, I don’t usually comment on your blog but do follow it with interest and joy. I recently recommend it to a friend whose child has just been diagnosed with autism; I think she’ll find your blog inspiring and helpful. Don’t pay attention to people who write nasty things, at the end of the day, that’s all they want, the attention. It is best to ignore them.
I hope you have a lovely and peaceful half term. x Pati
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As you sow, you reap. So much support for you and your family in blogland. You sow beauty and lighten the days for those who follow your world. Fred however….
Your foxes reminded me of the ‘Danny Fox story I read to my children. Love your picture of Toby. ABC’s do work, and even if the antecedents aren’t clear at first, they do focus action. HT hat on, I’ll take it off and wish you much love.
x
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Julie, that comment from Fred was TOTALLY uncalled for!
Obviously he’s never dealt with anyone with Autism.
He’s ignorant and mean spirited!
Your blog is lovely, and YOU are a wonderful Mom, and a very strong women! not to mention very talented and artistic.
You rock!
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Oodles more Julies and far fewer freds and we would have a much better world. No-one encapsulates the “when given lemons make margeritas” sentiment than you Julie.
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I missed a “more” out of that last post. No-one encapsulates it more than you Julie.
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Those foxes noses are good enough to eat! Love them.
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I’m shocked that anyone could say such things when they have NO IDEA what your life is truly like, and what joy you bring to us all in spite of your struggles. As you say so well and calmly, a mean-spirited, angry, nasty human – who better not dare ever darken this comment box again. Only kindered spirits required here.
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I don’t think that person appreciates that when things are tough it’s very theraputic to put your feelings down. A problem shared and all that..If they don’t like what your saying they should shove off! You carry on my love because, as you can see, there are A LOT of us who love to check in with you and see how you are doing. I admire you and your strength…and you make beautiful wooly wonders too!! Sue V x x x x
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Some people should just not be allowed to comment.
Anyway – absolutely love the little fox heads – try to ignore nasty people.
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You are so kind and well spoken…I think “fred” is an ass… I continue to marvel at the fact that you are so positive, no matter how hard things get, and i always like to stop by and read your posts and send a little healing energy your way. I send my love,, mare
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Well I personally love your blog! I don’t always get around to commenting each time. But, I love seeing what you have made I also love hearing about your family keep it up!
p.s love love love the little foxys!!!!
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Oh Julie – what a horrible thing to have said to you. My sister and I were talking knitting yesterday and I was telling her how inspirational you were, this horrid man was one nasty little grain of sand on a beach full of many other grains of sand who think who you are and what you do are truly wonderful. I have been having a tough time recently and where so many, many people have been wonderful you do come across the occasional one who gives u a nasty knock – the best advice I feel I can offer is to focus on the majority who really care and blot the horrid individuals out because they are not worth using valuable brain cells to even consider. I love the photo of Toby how cute does he look all snuggled up lucky boy. Take care Davina x
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Oh Julie, I’m so sorry to hear that you have been on the receiving end of such a comment. I had a similar thing happen to me quite some time ago when the (anonymous) person left a mean and spiteful comment about me on Christmas Day of all days. I felt shocked and upset that anyone could be so mean. Don’t let such people spoil your outlet for your creative talents ~ your real blogging friends support you. Marie x
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Your little fox heads are adorable! When I read a few comments on more public sites such as a news site (which I don’t often) I am so shocked at how mean-spirited they often are that it makes me feel ill. That is one reason I don’t allow comments. Besides not really having the time to deal with comments, I’m also easily inhibited and don’t want to leave myself open to being crushed in spirit. It always astounds me when a commenter for an autobiography on Amazon says something like the author seemed self-absorbed. Hello! It’s an autobiography! And likewise, most blogs are autobiographical, so it’s just as you say … if a reader doesn’t care for it no one is forcing them to read or comment. You are obviously an amazing person, so I hope one bad apple doesn’t spoil it for you. Wishing you many blessings. Bess
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What a sad git to leave a comment like that! You have never come across as a moaner, this is your online diary and you are lovely enough to share your emotions and life with us (oh and gorgeous creations) – ignore the ignorant person.
I hope half term is ok for you and there aren’t too many melt downs from your lovely little boy.
Take care and have a fab week. xxx
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Hello Julie.
Am gleeful at the EXPLOSION OF COMMENTS on here. It really is the most magical thing to see such an outburst of kindness and support from strangers dotted all over the globe, but linked together by your blog.
A thoroughly modern expression of the human heart!
In a topsy turvy way I’m almost glad Fred commented, so you could see how much we love reading your blog.
Keep writing and I look forward to seeing the fully-fledged foxes.
Happy half term
x
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Julie,
First of all, you are fabulous, inspiring, and totally awesome and it makes my day whenever you have a new post! Secondly, I work with AUTISTIC children and I’ve heard great things about parents using WEIGHTED BLANKETS to help their child SLEEP through the night. Check out this website, they have lots of testimonials from happy and rested families. Best of luck to you and your family.
Kim 🙂
http://www.weightedblanket.net/
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I never feel like you’re using this blog to “complain.” Living with autism is a daily challenge, filled with good and bad. I like hearing about things that are working or not working for others. Keep being you and doing your best and leave the nasty people to someone else to worry about.
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Remember how much we, out here in blogland, love you and keep your sense of perspective….you are lucky there is only one bad apple in this bushel of ours!
H left a comment: (Have started making up some of your bunny egg cosies as gifts for Easter – they look fabulous. Have been thinking of you as I make them.) What bunny egg cosies??? Where can I buy pattern, they sound adorable?
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Reading all these comments reminds me that people like you, Julie, who are willing to open themselves to others on a far bigger scale than most of us would dare, are an immense blessing. The Freds of the world are always with us, and will do their best to hurt the vulnerable ones. It’s ironic that you are protecting your vulnerable child, and because you are sharing your experiences with us are made vulnerable yourself. Please believe that what you’re doing is immensely valuable (see all the comments if you ever doubt that), and keep your chin up. I believe that any attempt to be more honest with each other about how difficult life can be helps each of us to bear our own burdens a little better. And I also think we’re all entitled to complain now and then! Isn’t most “complaining” just a way of saying “Wait a minute, can’t we do things better than this?” Much love to you from my part of the universe, Kate
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I think fred was commenting on the wrong blog. You are positive and inspirational, not to mention incredibly creative and have very good taste in shoes! Go here – this lady has a great attitude to negative comments!
http://foothillhomecompanion.blogspot.com/2011/02/free-at-last.html
I struggled for years with the sleeplessness and the tantrums, but one idea that worked for us (sorry to repeat if someone has already suggested this) – my son slept better when “tucked in”. Just a light throw over the top of the duvet tucked into the mattress to hold everything firmly in place. Somehow had a calming effect.
Have a peaceful half term week(is that an oxymoron?)
xxx
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Dear Julie
it takes such courage to share the downs and not just the ups on a blog and it’s extremely hurtful when you’re attacked for your honesty. I can only assume this commenter is having a hard time themselves but doesn’t have the love and support that we are all lucky enough to have.
Have a lovely half-term break – may the sunshine so you can get out and about. love Nic x
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I enjoy your blog and think you complain very, very little. I am getting thoroughly sick of people commenting on and being offended by other people’s opinions. If you don’t like the tone of someone’s blog, then don’t bloody read it!
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Your blog is you chance to work through your feelings and emotions dealing with a child who has challenges. It is obvious the commentor has no experience with such issues! Those of us who do read your postings and send our encouragement your way! Hope you can feel that support.
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Although I see there’s been an outpouring of support, I’d still like to add in yet another comment about how beautiful and inspiring your blog is, and how baffling the unkind behavior of others can be. It’s amazing, though, how one pin can stand out so sharply (for me, anyway); I’m glad you’re rising above it and know that so many of us are out here cheering you on.
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I too don’t always leave a comment, but love reading your blog and seeing all your beautiful animals grow. I think you are amazing in the way that you cope with Toby and the problems that present themselves. I work in a school as an admin and I have spent the last 18 months as a shadow tutor. I have several students who have varying levels of learning difficulties and i have found it hard to communicate with one in particular. Slowly things are improving and now he will say “Good Morning Miss” I realised that patience was the key and that came from you. Thank you Julie. I echo other commentors feelings about the unpleasant comment but i suspect that it was done to cause a reaction, which of course it achieved. and now he’s reading all the reaction and reveling in it sadly. ignore him he’s not worth it was always my Grans saying and i agree. i hope you have a lovely half term. Jane x
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The only comment I have about the not-so-nice comment left on your blog is that whatever was meant by it, it’s a reflection of their own “stuff”, baggage, whatever one might call it and not yours.
Some people can’t resist the urge to lash out at people they perceive to have a better lot in life and tell them so. I enjoy your blog posts and wouldn’t give another thought to that unfun post.
In life, we can each choose to be a blessing or a curse in our day. This person didn’t fall into the blessing category. Their choice. Not a reflection on you.
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Just to say love your blog your knitting is amazing i think and the animals really cute also like everyone else can’t believe that someone left such a nasty comment. I’m sure everyone reading your blog understands its not just about knitting, and i didn’t think you were being negative or moaning. Fred however was being negative and should have kept comments to him/herself in my opinion!!
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I’ve read your blog for years, and what has amazed me even more than your wonderful knitting bunnies has been the lengths you’ve gone to to meet the needs of both your children, obviously putting most of your own needs on hold.
You’re so right that comments like that reflect on the person making the comment only. It’s almost incomprehensible to me that anyone could have written that comment seriously, and almost even more incomprensible that it could have been a joke. I’m sorry you got it, but like you said, it had nothing to do with you.
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Julie,
Every time I visit your blog, people by the dozen have said what I think and so I tend not to leave a comment repeating them. This time, I am SO ANGRY on your behalf that I’d feel like a fraud if I didn’t post to say that you must – MUST – look at the hundreds, nay thousands, of positive and lovely comments you receive and ignore the solitary eejit who obviously has no clue of what they speak.
I do love that saying, “Before you criticise a person, walk a mile in their shoes” because nobody can possibly understand what it’s like to live with an Autistic child unless they’ve been there.
Wishing you & yours a wonderful half term break.
– Vonnie xx
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I don’t know you…but after having read your blog for about a month now I am impressed by what you get done considering your life circumstances. I think you are doing a great job!
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Julie,
I’m sure it must be obvious from all these lovely comments how much joy and positivity you bring into the lives of so many with your own experience. Your blog is one of my very favorites. You make me want to be a better knitter, and most of all…a better mom. You are an inspiration to me. Love, Katie
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Hi Julie,
I was most shocked to read Fred’s comments recently and haven’t been able to get what he/she said out of my head….If your life is so “privileged”, I would like to see Fred experience it for a day or even a week! I don’t think he/she would think you so lucky, then.. I find your blog so inspirational and think you a are a truly remarkable person. I know I would not cope as well as you if our lives were reversed. Take care and big hugs, AudreyXX
PS Enjoy the break!!
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That truely was a mean-spirited person. Comments like that are un-necessary. I agree with the person that said if you haven’t got something nice to say, don’t say anything at all. I tell my children this all the time. Clearly this person is without compassion or grace. I hope for their sake they are as happy with their lot as they would have us believe we all should be. I suspect the reverse is true and this is a bitter, sad, empty person. EVERYONE has bad days and good days and what’s the point in a blog if you can’t share both? As you say it reflects poorly on them and not on you and in reality they and their comment are not worthy of the attention they are getting. Rise above it Julie – you bear your cross, as do we all, and you manage to do it with unerring love for your family but you are entitled and healthy in voicing your fears, your joys, your exhaustion and your frustration and above all your enduring hopes for positive outcomes in life and recognising the moments of happiness when they arise. You are an inspiration unlike this pathetic individual. Let it be gone.
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I read your blog on a regular basis and really enjoy it.
I am sorry you received such a silly comment, but I can’t help but feel sorry for ‘Fred’, they must have a very sorry, sad little life to leave such a miserable comment on such a lovely blog. Your blog is full of colour, happiness and yes there are some challenges which you are very open about but you certainly don’t moan and complain. Ignore and carry on!
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Do not waste time on the negative – that 2% is always “out there”. Lack of understanding and knowledge shouts from their comment. My heart breaks for you when I hear about sleepless nights and all you are going through. Yes, he is a lucky guy to have you for his mum. God doesn’t give us more than we can handle – but sometimes we have to ask Him to help us lift the load a bit. You have a special talent in your creativity and you are making many people smile.
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On Dr. Oz show they touched on autism. Go to his website to see what they know (it seems to be very little!).
Do you know about the success with gluten-free diets?
love the foxes and esp. the bunnies!!
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I read lots of blogs and never comment. One or two I have read have got a bit moany so I just stopped Reading them. I love Reading yours and I don’t ever get the feeling that you are complaining – I love Reading your stuff. I think people who feel the need to say unpleasant things are saying more about themselves than they are about you. Keep going – I’m only a novice crafter and dint have children either with or without special needs, but I think your site is great!! I never fail but to be impressed by how you manage to juggle everything and produce such lovely creations!
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Gorgeous foxes and a not-so-gorgeous comment. Your response was perfect. Hopefully Fred won’t bother you again.
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I have a lovely little boy, he has translocated chromosomes and i live very far away from all of my friends (my extended family) but when ever we speak, they only want to known about him and what is going on in his life, good and bad.
The reason i read your blog is because you speak to me, you tell me your good moments and bad, you make me part of your family and life…I feel like I’m a listening friend, i thank you.
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You and I know that we count our blessings every single day. We love our children with so much love that sometimes it feels that we will collapse under the strain. But also there are days when we could get in the car, put the radio on to something really loud and drive into the sunset. That is being human, being a woman and you are entitled to write whatever you want, uncensored. Keep posting and please do not self-censor because one person out of probably thousands didn’t agree. Call it the benefit of living in a democracy, smile and ignore them!!!(sorry if it sounds a bit bossy – dont mean to be, just cross!!)
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I love your blog, Julie. Yours was the first blog I stumbled upon in blogland…I think I must have googled something about knitting as I’m a beginner. You inspired me to try blogging and “My Southern Heart” was born. Thank you.
I love the little foxes and can’t wait to see the entire creation! Maybe one of these days, I’ll get beyond scarves.
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~All these responses to your post have been wonderful and supportive Dear Julie…
~Love, your blog,posts,talent/gifts!
Keep on keeping on…there are some mean spirited people out there. So sad.
Hugs & love sent your way!
~YOU ROCK!;)
Debbie
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I hope you have a good half term.
I recognize that by following routine or filling in charts you get the feeling of at least doing something, like it’s not completely out of hands…
I wish you well, hope spring comes soon. (here snow is back since yesterday, well….it’s only just february I guess)
I love the foxes-to-be! Will they be up for sale? (or a pattern?)
I’m currently making more of your hedgehogs, as we await for our little hedgehogs to wake up in spring in our garden)
Kind regards,
Heidi
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Your beautiful soul shines through your post as always 🙂 You have to feel a bit sad for people who have nothing nice to say, they must be very unhappy with themselves?? Your little foxes are fantastic….made me think of Three Little Foxes…A. A. Milne 🙂
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Hi, I just find your beautiful blog. Thank you fore sharing your inspiration with us!! Sorry for my bad english hm… Have a nice week/ Gela
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Honestly, no one knows what it is like to live day in and day out unless they too have a child with autism. One thing I do know after caring for my father with Alzheimer’s at home was that sleep deprivation on the part of the care provider is very serious. As I am in the USA, I wouldn’t know if http://www.generationrescue.org/ has made it your way. All the best to you. You have a lovely blog.
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I feel that this is extremely common in the blogging because of the anonymity of posting comments. People who post horrible comments are not accountable for what they say and it’s unfortunate. It always saddens me a little bit when I read about how this happens to my favorite bloggers. With the exception of these people, I’ve found that most people are really very kind and supportive. Don’t let the bad ones get you down!
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Lovely foxes (well their heads anyway!), lovely photo of Toby. Anyone who knows you even a teeny bit will realise that the nasty comment is so far from the mark it’s ridiculous. You are one of the most creative, generous, observant, good humoured and compassionate people going – a good egg through and through. So there!
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oh my god… I can’t believe there are people who take time to be mean… talk about wasted life!
You hang in girl. You’re fab., and we’re all behind you.
Stupid git.
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Hi Julie , I have read your blog for years and never once, even when things have been tough for you, have I felt you have been complaining. I have always felt your blog to be uplifting and I am sure it is a great comfort to those also with autistic children. As for Fred , dear me , you obviously have never raised any children of your own, or you never would have left such a silly comment.
All the best Julie
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adding my voice to the chorus —
it appears to me that you DO count your blessings, and that you have, through much work, created the beauty and blessings that surround you.
your blog is an inspiration to me (i have similar challenges in my life) precisely because of the precious warmth and grace with which you describe those challenges.
it is clear to me that those who might say you do not express gratitude have not actually read what you have to say.
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very nice fox 🙂
Good idea!!
Good week and kisses from Italy!! thank u so much
Leilaluna
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A nice way to see it is that this Fred person who tried to spread his unhappiness onto others has instead shown you how much love and support you do have in the world…you deserve it and keep reaching out and finding the support you need. These special children find a way to bring great community into our lives and that is a blessing. Love to you..Heather Lelu
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I have followed your blog for a while now though I rarely ever comment. I have found your blog fun, interesting and heartwarming. Not once have I ever seen you “complain” about anything in your life! As the mother of a special needs child I know that things can be tough and not everyone understands. And as most people have, sadly, discovered there are a lot of people in this world that love to spread misery to others in an attempt to make themselves feel better. Please do not let such people or their comments change you in any way. You and your blog are a delight! I think that you are doing a fantastic job with Toby and I will continue to keep you and your family in my prayers. Take care and remember to take some time to take care of you!!!
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love the little vixen heads can’t wait to see the rest
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I hdd my first negative comment last week. But I choose not to post it. it was mean and spiteful and I didn’t want it as part of my blog. Sorry this happened to you but well done for having the courage to include it.
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Fred needs to take his/her own advice and be grateful for his own life and stop telling other people how “privileged” they are. Some nerve.
I hope all these supportive comments help make up for any pain that insensitive comment caused.
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Oh my, I can’t believe that mean comment was even left. I would say if he didn’t have anything nice to say why say anything at all? The only one complaining was him, and I’d say he needs to take his own post into account and stop the complaining!
There are plenty of mean blogs and web sites for Fred to visit if he doesn’t like yours, why keep reading?
I never get the feel that you’re complaining (rather I think you are so gracious under pressure) and you are in a tough situation, which Fred obviously knows nothing about. I do hope he found some other blog he likes better to go read on a regular basis.
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Just to add you do not ever complain as far as I can see – you share and you get supprot because you share honestly.
‘Privilege’ as Fred puts it is a little bit difficult to define isn’t it – are you ‘lucky’ not to be able to work 8 hours a day so you can do your 15 odd (at very odd hours of the night) hours as a parent to Toby.
But I think yes you are privileged – to have very wonderful talent for knitting and for sharing your stories so that other people can gain from that.
You have helped me enormously over the last three years, I know you have never met me but what you have posted has helped me with things I have had to deal with – so yes you are privileged – to be able to help others – and I agree with the one of the earlier comments – go away Fred!
Sending you very big hugs
Alison x
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I just found your blog and love all your knitted toys. The foxes look gorgeous already, even without eyes and bodies. 🙂
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I am so inspired by your courage. You have so much on your plate and still take time to be creative. My last name is Fox and I collect foxes. I have coveted you Foxes. They are so sweet. I would love to buy one.Thanks
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