Another week begins and I’m still not back into the swing of term time but meanwhile I’d love your advice. I’ve really dug myself a big hole – and fallen straight into it! Any tips on how to get myself out?
You see when Amy lost her very first tooth she wrote such a sweet note to the tooth fairy and her little face the next morning was so sad when there was no reply – that’s how it began.
A few months later the loss of a second tooth prompted her to write another lovely note and I couldn’t bear the thought of her disappointment once more so out came my finest-tipped pen and a tiny slip of paper and a reply was made.
And so it continued. Letters from Amy
and replies from Sparkle, the tooth fairy
Here’s a small extract from a correspondance with a fairy:
To Spakle.
I lost my tooth in the cinimar the cineworld screen were it says star dust three seats at the back if not there look evrewere else
love Amy P.S the postcode is cm202da pleese baleeve me!! xxxxxxx
Dearest Amy,
Do not worry, of course I believe you and I will go now and find your tooth. Humans do not know this but teeth give a special ringing sound when they fall out which only us fairies can hear. It is how we know that a tooth needs collecting, so I will find it easily. Thank you for your nice note explaining everything,
your fairy friend Sparkle x
Anyway, I’ve been caught out! I put the letters from Amy in my underwear drawer along with a little pot containing the teeth and in a nosey moment over the school break she discovered them! I’ve garbled some fluff about buying them back from the tooth fairy because I wanted to keep them but by her suspicious look she’s not buying it! I’m hoping that she’ll forgive me when she finally works out the truth!
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when our little ones are involved!
little cotton rabbits 
Oh what a shame she had to find those letters. I loved reading both letters – it’s really nice that some little girls, like Amy, are still allowed to be little girls. Sophie was like that, too.
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How annoying that you got caught out I hate it when that happens.
You could always tell her that the tooth fairy left them with you to make into a special book for her, so that when she was older she wouldn’t forget the tooth fairy and she would be left with some nice memories.
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Pity that you were caught out 🙂 It would have been a really cute game to play for a while longer and then she’ll have these letters to look at again when she’s older.
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AAaargh! Same here!!!!! We didn’t do/ don’t do the note part (we leave that for Santa!!) but i’ve kept the teeth in a little pot in my underwear drawer since the 1st one! The pesky, routing thru’ drawer 9yr old found the pot…TOLD his 7yr old sister and had to be dissuaded with chocolate from telling the 3yr old. I, however, found a way of making the magic go on…on a nature walk a while back we found a rabbits jaw bone. That as also in my knicker drawer(?) and so i have persuaded the kids that they are animal teeth that we’ve brought home over the last few years! The 7yr old believes me. The 9yr old isn’t so sure. I’m laying it on thick with him that not believing means NOT getting etc. He is SO young in so many ways that it seems SO sad for this part of childhood to go first!
What will you do? My approach…LIE, LIE, and LIE some more! The type of lie that keeps magic alive…i believe, i believe, i believe!
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If there’s a slim chance she still may believe you, try writing an official letter from the toothfairy or from the Chief of Worldwide Toothfairies to YOU.
You could mention that the toothfairy gave back the notes and the teeth only after being reviewed by Toothfairy headquarters.
Parents are then instructed to keep the teeth and the letters to make a memory book or box for the child.
Your story reminds me of when I caught my father putting out Christmas presents marked “from Santa” in the middle of the night.
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Oh I hate it when they KNOW!! My 10 year old son just gives me the money back now if I dare leave anything under his pillow – with a disparaging ‘don’t be silly Mum’ …. I think the book (above) is a great idea – you could say that the tooth fairy left Amy’s letters under your pillow – because that’s what the fairy does with children’s letters – gives them back to the Mummy otherwise her bag would be full of letters and there would be no room for the teeth…..
I made a little cape for the tooth fairy (out of red felt) when I was young because I was worried that she would be cold flying around in just her sparkly dress! My Mum still has that cape, and the tooth fairy’s little letter of thanks …..bless …
Good luck! Hope Father Christmas is still safe!
Debbiexx
Actually to fully appreciate that story you ought to know that I am 47 and my Mum 72!!
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I agree with the above – LIE! It is so lovely for her to believe in something so wonderful that it is worth keeping it alive as long as possible.
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hmmm, tough one! I actually misread it and thought you said she had found out the tooth LOL! Anyway, I had the same thing with my Mum when I was little – She kept all our teeth in her jewellery box and we found them! I think she said something along the lines of the tooth fairies have so many, they gave them to her (my Mum) for safe keeping! We bought it for a few more years at least!
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I’ve been writing notes to the tooth fairy for many years now – but my kids have kept their notes AND the fairy notes. My daughter suspects it’s me – my son doesn’t yet (I hope!) x
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We are in a similar position. My girl is ten this Christmas and in my family that was always the year you were allowed to meet Santa. She is only believing still out of habit and the potential for no presents if she doesn’t believe…. oh what to do??!?!
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I agree with bigbucketgirl… tell her the Mummy’s get to keep the teeth and letters cos the fairy is so small she can’t carry everything!
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My youngest daughter was 9 years old and beacaus a few children at school told her Sinterklaas did’nt exist. I asked her what she believed and she said; well, mom, I already knew last year , but I didn’t want to dissapoint you and I was afraid, i wouldn’t get any present anymore;-)))
Just ask her what she thinks and make a story around her believe.
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Lots of ideas here to help save the day! And did you see the tooth fairy post Pipany wrote?
http://pipany-poltiskofarm.blogspot.com/
Scroll down and you will find it!
D x
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Ooohh, I feel for you as I’ve been in this situation twice before – once as a child and once with my stepson.
It’s hard when a creative and well-intentioned, loving mama like yourself inds herself with the task of “preserving the childhood magic without taking a nip at a child’s trust.
And, I guess that’s my recommendation. When my stepson stood at the foot of our bed and asked – my husband said that YES, the spirit of the toothfairy is very real. I am not the toothfairy as you have imagined but when you were born, I was given a very special task to carry on the toothfairy’s work.
Of course there were a lot of questions…but essentially, we explained that somehow because WE STILL believe in the tooth fairy, the fairy send us a spirit of guidance – what to do when our little one loses a tooth. What treasures to find and pass on to our litte one one.
As far as if the toothfairy existed and what they look like – well, we’re not sure that we’ve ever seen a fairy but that doesn’t mean that they don’t exist. You could even draw with her what her fairy might look like.
And the part he liked the most was that someday, he would carry on this too for his children (all boys he said – no girls for him, all sons!)
I know everyone’s situation is different and I answer lots of my kid’s questions with what in the end might not be the best answers but I just wanted to send my thought along just in case it appealed to you.
My mother, out of love, came up with a convincing story when I had a similar discovery as a young child (I was overly curious for sure!). I was doubtful and asked her again but then her reason was enough and I believed.
Until my friends broke the big news and I could not imagine why mom had not told me the truth and as a result, did it mean that NO magic existed – what about Santa, etc.
I was not a super dramatic kid but this really socked it to me. It made me sad.
NOW your daughter is probably much more grounded than I was – so I apologize if this all sounds like crazy talk.
I now good-heartedly joke with my mom that she should have paid for therapy for my tooth fairy incident.
I believe in all magical childhood things now in a different way I guess – not as actual people but as possibilities, spirits of giving and celebration. And my 9 year old step son still does too.
He doesn’t think Santa comes into our house but he does think the spirit of Santa helps him think of the best gifts to make/get us! And I do too!
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I wouldn’t worry too much, for the fun of the correspondence can surely outweigh the burden of finding out the truth. It puts me in mind of the lovely compilation of JRR Tolkien’s Father Christmas letters written to his children. What imagination had he to create an entire world at the North Pole with the regular mishaps of the North Polar Bear and the constant interference of the goblins. Surely his children had to know the ‘truth’ but still, it was the journey that was enjoyable.
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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It seems that there’s a Tooth Fairy ‘thing’ going on at the moment. Only the other day I was reading on someone else’s blog about Tooth Fairy problems (Pipany’s I think).
We still do the notes but Tara (our fairy) has always left them behind so I just gather them up to look after. Kiddie has a couple of hers with her life-sized Tooth Fairy doll (3″ high) that she asked for instead of a coin last time around. But it’s all worth it. She campaigns to convert the non-believers in her class she is still so convinced. :o)
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I’m pretty sure this is how the Tooth Fairy works in every country, but here in the USA she has to contract out the storage for all the teeth and corresponding letters as there is no single site large enough for all of them in one place. Her first choice for offsite storage of her special teeth-related-treasures is with the mothers themselves because she knows that they are the most concerned and careful with their own children’s things. You may have to check in your area, but that is how the TF works here!
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Wow, it’s a tough one!
I would NOT lie, you had a really sweet thing going on but you got caught, no big deal but I think it’s important to tell her like it is now so she knows that while it’s lovely to imagine another world it’s even more important to know that your Mom is telling you the plain truth. She’ll understand you did all this because you loved her and she’ll even be more grateful for your honesty.
GOOD LUCK!
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We’ve got the first tooth on the way out, and that is such a sweet idea. I am dreading the day mine find all the letters they sent to Father Christmas carefull squirrelled away …
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Oh dear, this takes me back to a disastrous Christmas Eve 4 years ago. After 4 hours assembling a terribly complicated playmobil pirate ship, I fell asleep on the living room floor, with one of Santa’s cookies half eaten in my hand, only to be awoken by my 7-year old’s accusatory stares in the morning.
I tend to think that there’s a point when the web of lies becomes far too complicated, and you have to come clean, or at least be so vague about it, that there’s still a bit of mystery left. If we’re lucky, our kids grow old enough to figure it out before we have to actually tell them the truth.
I also love the above book idea. What a wonderful keepsake. You’re tooth fairy letters are delightful. I wish I’d taken such a creative approach.
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I sympathize with your daughter, but she must be brave, for you are going to tell Amy the truth even if it means betraying the vow of silence that mothers (and fathers) take just before their children are born. Of course you know what I mean, but just to be clear: you must now tell Amy that all the writing of fairies is done by parents and friends of parents.
Sadly, mothers and fathers are the sacred secretaries of the fairy world. You know it, I know it, the postman knows it and now Amy MUST know it. Fairies have no other way to write. Pens and pencils are too heavy for fairies to lift and their attention spans are short. Human have tried forever to teach the fairies to write, but every single effort has resulted in horrible, unreadable scratchings: missing letters, unfinished thoughts, undotted i’s! Suggest that Amy try writing using only her little finger (which is about how much strength a fairy has) and talking about three things at once. See how far she gets.
Of course now that Amy knows what we know, she will have to assume the adult responsibility of taking dictation from any fairy that wants to bend her ear. She should set aside a special pen and stationary to do this. Perhaps if she listens carefully with pen in hand, a fairy will dictate a note to someone close to her. This requires practice and doesn’t happen just because a human wants it to. Does a mouse stop wiggling its nose just because she says stop? Fairies have minds of their own. Still, perhaps there is a fairy waiting to write to a classmate whose parents are too busy to take dictation.
As to the teeth, be realistic. How can a fairy carry anything so heavy? In my family the tooth fairy only managed to carry my teeth as far as my father’s desk drawer, setting them in a sardine can right next to the pad and pen he used for dictation.
I found them cleaning out his things last year. Bless his heart. My father was good at keeping secrets.
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I can’t wait to see how this turns out.
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Hey I was just thinking… how’s bout you have someone from a distance pop a letter in the mail to your daughter explaining the whole thing about leaving the notes under your pillow.
She wouldn’t possible second guess a letter that arrives in the mail from CANADA (per se).
Let me know if I can help.
daldak01@yahoo.ca
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oh, julie that is hilarious! and i love those notes – so sweet! i have no idea how you’re going to get out of that – but good luck!
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Good luck in finding a way round this one. My Mum used to say that the truth was best when you got found out! I think, though that when Amy is all grown up she’ll remember how magical it was to get such gorgeous tooth fairy letters…that sort of Mum-magic lasts and lasts!
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Oh yes – I know that problem!!!! I also remember being about 10 and seeing a letter my little sister got from Father Christmas in my Mum’s handwriting – I was devastated!!
April xx
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My daughter found the teeth I’d saved in a box, but I did what you did and said I’d bought them back from the Tooth Fairy. That seemed to satisfy her, I think part of them already knows the lie, but they’ll keep the game going as long as possible. It’s like realizing that dolls don’t really come to life at night… it’s still nice to think they do and still reason enough to make sure they’re lying properly covered in their beds and not in a heap on their heads, right? I think when they’re older, all they’ll remember is the fact that we cared enough to put so much detail in the story for so long, and they won’t think of it as a betrayal or a lie. You’re a great mummy and a great Sparkle Fairy and both your kids know that.
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How funny – the exact same thing happened with my daughter. She used to write letters to the tooth fairy too, and so of course I had to reply! Our fairy was called Faye, and I wrote the replies in my tiniest handwriting on tiny pieces of coloured paper. My daughter started leaving presents for her – at first it was a daisy chain, but later she made a tiny bracelet out of cotton and three little beads! She still has all those fairy letters – and she’s 21 now! She was a bit disappointed when she eventually found out the tooth fairy was really me. But, the great thing is, up to a certain point children will believe whatever story you provide, and as Michelle says, she will be grateful when she’s older that you tried so hard to keep the fantasy real for her sake for as long as possible.
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Hi Julie
I loved this post. It made me smile and I even read it to my hubby. I’m sure you’ll work it out in your creative way. Such a lovely story to tell. One for when she’s older too 🙂 Take care x
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Hah! I hate to get found out. Once, before my daughter figured me out – I forgot to come on the appointed night. Luckily, there was a storm that night and I was able to convince her that fairies can’t travel in thunderstorms. The next night was clear and waa-laa, the tooth fairy was able to make the trip! Have a nice day!
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Ooooohhhhh. You’ve opened up a whole world of make believe that I hadn’t really thought about yet! (I have a 3 and 1 year old). I hope all goes well whatever happens. My mum – up until I got married and left home – still did up “santa sacks” for me!! Once we worked out about how things really worked – she decided that it was something special that she’d been doing all these years and didn’t want to stop it! Hope Amy is cool with everything! 🙂
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The tooth fairy has been banished from our house when my little boy found the idea of a strange fairy coming into the house at night was just too scary – he wouldn’t touch the coins from his first tooth (santa claus is also an issue). We had nightmares and sleep walking. Good grief!!! He also used to scream when I read ‘the three billy goats gruff’ – it must be the way I tell it!!!
I love your wee letters they are charming.
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Oh no!!!
but…
How lovely of you to make such a sweet ‘tooth fairy tradition’.
For now Ithink youought to avoid telling the truth – because that would possibly blow santa and the easter bunny out of the water as well -perhaps you can say that you mugged each and every tooth fairy as they were leaving and their tiny bones are buried somewhere in the back garden (you could pop some toothpicks and bits of fluff in a matchbox)
Oh dear, that’s terrible, but I couldn’t help it.
However, I would try not to mention it again and hopefully Amy will stop asking about it – just stick to what you’ve already told her – it’s too soon yet to give up on all that childhood deliciousness.
Good luck.
* and I don’t need to say it, but next time – hide anything up high.
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On the other hand – I totally agree with Alexandra about not lying to your children – so, if Amy doesn’t let the subject drop – my advice would be to be honest about it.
Don’t you just wish you could turn back the clock?
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Lol 😉 You and I are having similar times lately in this area I fear. Although my son hasn’t found his hidden teeth, he just lost a tooth and had this question for me ” Mommy, are you and Daddy really the tooth fairy?” with that certain look that they get when they are working things out. Of course I too explained it away with a tale. It wasn’t exactly easy either, because older brother was putting in his two cents as to why we might be the tooth fairy as well. So I had to convince him as well. Oh my it’s getting harder to keep these things up, Santa is another thing all together LOL 😉
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I love it that you have gone to so much trouble to make the tooth fairy live for your little angel. You are a fabulous mum Julie. I too neeeeded to keep the teeth of my little man when they started to fall out. I just could not let them leave the house. So I told him that if you ask the tooth fairy, before you go to bed, to leave the tooth then that is what they will do. So we have our lost teeth and the tooth fairy still lives. I think that your have thought fast on your feet. I definitely think that buying them back is a valid reason for having those teeth! I guess at the end of the day…if you don’t believe then you don’t receive.
As for mothers keeping teeth…my grandmother was a stoic old lady. She had 10 children who, due to the death of her husband, she largely raised herself. In addition to this she ran a large orcharding property and had no running hot water, electricity…She was a formidable woman. You behaved when she told you to behave. But when she died they found a little pot and inside it were all the teeth that her 10 children had ever lost…she wasn’t so tough after all.
Good luck with the fairy Julie!
Jen
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My children all adults now, all openly detest me for the lies and deceptions that I put upon them as children in regards to The Tooth Fairy, Santa, Easter Bunny Etc.
When gold fish died I would drive around trying to find an exact same looking gold fish and be home with the tank cleaned out and them none the wiser. I was trying to save them pain and upset, myintentions honourable, but deceptive just the same….(their dad dobbed me in). And now as a result I am not permitted to be a part of their lives nor their children. I am paying dearly.
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My daughter actually asked me if I was the tooth fairy the other day. I asked what she thought and she said “No I dont think you are” so I left it at that. She still believes in Santa and the Easter Bunny too, but by Grade 5 I will inform her of those things so she can adjust before high school. My son believed in Santa until Grade 6 when the school teacher told them he wasnt real and explained that in high school those things werent believed in anymore. I was so angry about it at the time but then realised he would probably have gotten teased if he said he still believed. I am sure you and Amy will find a good solution to this tale and it will work out fine too. I think your little letters were so cute.
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Well, everybody knows that the Tooth Fairy is SO small that it would be difficult for her to travel/fly away while carrying the tooth AND such big sheets of paper! So she reads and memorizes all of Amy’s notes and carries all the information always with her in her heart and mind! You were simply keeping those teeth and notes for her in case she needed to refresh her memory…It’s as simple as that! 😉
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Ugh! We used to get in massive trouble for going through my parents stuff so we never did it more than once. It just wasn’t worth it. So far, my daughter has lost 4 teeth and we’ve asked her if she wants the tooth fairy to come and take them and bring her money but she always says no. She said she has enough money! So she keeps her own teeth in a little collectible jar with a fairy bear on it. I’m not sure what I would do. I would probably make up something about how the tooth fairy needs helpers to collect all the teeth and how no one is supposed to know you are a helper. Make her in on the secret! She might like that! Good luck!
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The same thing happened to me, the box of teeth were found. I also made up a story about writing a note to the tooth fairy asking to have my childrens teeth as they were so special. They are now 15 and 13 and they were so okay with it. Just tell them how special their teeth are to you and that you wanted to have them to keep and your sorry that she had to find out that way, that you would have told her when she go older. Good luck. Take care. Margaret.
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Oh Julie the plight of Motherhood! The kids are so smart now, I compare raising my daughter to now help raising my granddaughter’s since my daughter passed. Abbey the 10 year old still wants to believe and tested me by placing a tooth under the pillow a few weeks ago, then told me that it came out the next day and the tooth fairy forgot to leave any money. Boy, that night I had to slip money under the pillow while hugs and kisses were going on and say a little prayer that she would not find it before morning..whew it worked. Thank goodness I could still out think her and not have to tiptoe into the room later and wake her..gotta stay a step ahead. Surly, Amy wants to still believe too and children are so forgiving. A good Mom always questions herself, but you belong to a huge club of us who make loving errors everyday….:)
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I’m glad to see that so many people still let their kids enjoy the fun of imagination and magic. I absolutely love my memories of Santa, princesses in castles in faraway lands, the tooth fairy & etc. The world is tough to live in sometimes & it helps to have some imagination to fall back on, somewhere inside you still believe a little in magic even though you know Santa isn’t real.
When my kids were old enough to ask me if Santa was real, I did the same as another Sue above. I asked “What do you think?”. I believe that if they’re old enough to let go of the fantasy they’ll say “I think he’s not real” and you can discuss it, if not then I would give them some more time to believe.
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it is just so important to put a little magic into child life, she will forgive you, and probably do the same to her own child when she’ll grown up
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Oh my goodness Julie ~ you have had some very detailed responses to this one!
I agree with previous comments that it is so lovely to find a child that still believes in the Tooth Fairy and Father Christmas ~ I would do whatever it takes to maintain that magic. I just love the letters you wrote to her too ~ it just goes to show what a special and caring Mum she has.
Marie x
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Oh no, what a shame! I do exactly the same with my 6 year old, handwritten letters from the tooth fairy. My daughter is so taken with the whole fantasy of the tooth fairy its got sooooooooo out of hand but its too late to turn back;
Every time she looses a tooth we read a story where a boy loses a tooth and the tooth fairy comes down to take them on a special visit to ‘cloudland’ where he plants his tooth so it can grow into a golden star (ahhhh!) After the first tooth fell out my daughter was so disapointed the fairy hadn’t appeared. I said she must have been to busy to visit this time but she’d definitely turn up the next…. so the next tooth falls out and she puts a dozen presents under her pillow for the fairy goes to bed with slippers on (to keep her feet warm in cloudland) and with her teddy tied to her wrist ( so he doesnt fall from the dove when she flies up there on its back) all very cute but leaving me the biggest hole in the world to climb out of!! Anyway in the morning she had a lovely letter from the tooth fairy thanking her for the tooth and saying how lovely it was to have her visit the fairies but because cloudland is a secret magical place the fairies had to spinkle her with fairy dust so she wouldn’t be able to remember!!
Back to your problem – lie but lie big and make it magical, it’ll all add to the fantasy.
Now to go hide my daughters teeth!!!!
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I’d lie too. Tell her the tooth fairy knows that mummies have to know who’s writing to their children and what they’re saying (remember internet safety, stranger danger and all that horrible stuff) and that she doesn’t mind mummy having the letters so that she can be sure her little girl is safe and happy and not talking to a wicked witch in disguise! It might stand her in good stead for later on in life.
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Just stress to her it is not appropriate for her to be snooping first of all. That is actually more important than her finding out about the tooth fairy! Then carry on, let her question you but stick to your guns. You are only doing a parents’ work. Children actually do understand when they grow up why we do these things! Good luck!
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I don’t have children yet but every now and then I would think about what I would tell them about such things. It seems cute when they are little but as they grow up, it gets harder and harder to keep up with the facade. I think you did nothing wrong. I remember when I was little, probably about 10 years old, there was a 5 foot paper-manche Big Bird in our classroom and all the kids use to write letters and put them in his hand and the next day we would find letters of reply from Big Bird on our desk. Eventually I realized that it was our teacher but I and all the other kids still continued to write to the paper-manche Big Bird. I was grateful that he took so much time to read and reply to all our little letters. He was a good teacher, as you are a good mom.
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I would take the cue from your daughter. You’ll know whether she wants to carry on with the make believe, in which case she will not persist asking you about the truth. That way you can both carry on for a little longer pretending the tooth fairy exists, which can be a very comforting thought for some children. Or she will want to know the truth now, even if it means accepting that Sparkle doesn’t actually exist. I believe that in both cases she will remember with fondness her correspondence with Sparkle when she is older, and see it as an expression of your love.
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Too cute. Even my 11 year old still “believes” in the tooth fairy, but I think in his case it’s the monetary part that makes him do it.
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I think this is all very dangerous. My mother-in-law told her children they had to set fire to Santa’s letters and they would magic from the smoke to his house – actually after a few years the debris caused a fire in the chimney! It sounds to me like your daughter would like to keep believing so if you can come up with something plausible and present it in a matter of fact way – I mean AS IT she could ever have doubted! Honestly! What nonsense! – the magic should continue. I think children just decide one day they’re too old and that’s when the magic stops – or in my case my silly dad came in when I was still awake! t.x
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I think you should show her the note you got from the toothfairy. You know, the note that asks if as the mommy, you would like to keep the special notes and teeth, as they are very special and how the toothfairy likes to do special things for mommies as well as children?
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Oh what a tangled web indeed, well I think you need to tell Amy the truth … that the tooth fairy is in fact dislecsick and can’t read or right but you didn’t want to let on and disappoint her. Always keep it simple, the smaller the lie the easier it is to cover up.
I myself had to sack the tooth fairy as her rates went up and I found her attendance to be tardy, forgetting one week remembering the next.
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I would take any of the “lie some more” type suggestions and run with it. My sister-in-law told my then-5-year-old nephew that there is no Santa (or Easter Bunny, or tooth fairy) when he asked outright, on the theory that it is bad to lie about anything when asked straight out. However, he then continued to believe for at least several more years, probably on the “just in case not believing means no presents” theory. And, he luckily did not tell his cousins (my kids) what she said.
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Those letters are so sweet, my little ones haven’t got to the losing teeth stage yet. I think you should go with your heart, who says fairies don’t exist anyway 🙂
lisa x
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Ahh how sweet a story J, i think you came up with a very good reason for them being in your drawer.
just wanted to let you AND amy know that i have posted a photo of the lovely Whisper LCR and Amy’s picture to me on my blog today.
i thought you might like her to see where her picture ended up, so thats why i’m letting you know. i posted a photo of the back of my bedroom door, complete with dressign gown on the handle as i thought it’d be fun for her to see!there’s also my own butterfly pic from about age 4
it was a lovely post to do
love kat xxxx
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No advice at all as I haven’t been down that path yet, but you might enjoy this book which is along a similar theme:
In the Kingdom of the Fairies by Susan Coyne
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Hi Julie, I had to smile at your story because the Tooth fairy came to visit Em last week (she’s 12 1/2) Like you there is an exchange of notes and usually there is a different fairy each time sometimes she has a pet. Well this time stumped for a fairy, I wrote that not all fairies have pets some have teddybears to keep them company! oh dear that let the cat out of the bag ‘cos Em started to laugh and said that sounds like a mummy fairy well what could i say? so i just smiled and said i can’t be a fairy i’m too big!!!!! But a couple of Christmases ago she made a comment about Father Christmas/Santa so I said I thought he was special and magical to fly round the world delivering presents in one night. So she quietly said to Tony that she knew Santa wasn’t real but that she didn’t want to spoil it for Mummy as I still believed – that did make me laugh. Jane x
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Oooohhhhh Noooooo! Of course she’ll forgive you — and love you all the more for being such a loving, creative mum!!!
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Oh, this is the cutest thing ever! I also have a little jar in my drawer holding my 6 yr. olds teeth. She has a little tooth fairy pillow with a little pocket in it, and she always leaves the tooth fairy a treat in it. Once she left a walnut half, once a grape, and another time some raisins. I have been hoping she wouldn’t find the teeth, but I was going to also say something about the fairy asking me to keep them for later, etc. or whatever I came up with at the time. This is just an adorable post!
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I still have a note from my now 33 year old to the tooth fairy. I know it off by heart and I keep it in my knicker drawer…why do we do that? lol I’m sure you will get away with this, I really hope so…
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My son is 6 and has not lost his first tooth yet but I know it should start soon. I bought a tooth fairy portal (link below) for the occasion. I did not want to try to reach under his pillow to trade the tooth for money.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=15354690
I will make sure that the teeth and any letters are well hidden after reading your story. I think it is great that you create such a sweet tradition for your daughter, one in which you hope she passes down.
Thanks for sharing.
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oopps! oh dear! i might just go and remove mine from my underwear drawer right now and put them up in the loft!
not sure how much longer i am going to get away with it as mine are 8 and 10. The eldest does know in her heart that the fairy has a helper but still likes to believes in magic as do i.
best wishes
ginny x
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We were having dinner with my son(30 years old) his wife, my other son(24 years old) and remembering how and when they found out about Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny. All of a sudden my 24 year old son looked up, opened his eyes wide and said, “Wait-WHAT about Santa??” Of course, we ALL still believe!
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Oh dear – that is very unfortunate for you. I hope that she will still believe for a little longer – I cried when I found out that they were make believe.
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