Well, Toby’s annual statement review is sorted for another year. It was great to hear his teachers say that he’s making some progress and having compared notes with them it seems that he’s more aware of the world since starting school. Often autistic children are very withdrawn, not making eye contact or even acknowledging the presence of anyone else in the room. They can sit for hours at a time completely lost in a repetitive activity and often strongly resist being touched or held. Toby used to be quite withdrawn and can still get like this when he’s extremely stressed. I try and comfort him by touch and a soothing voice but this increases his stress and can result in a full-blown, self-harming outburst. Although it’s hard, I’ve learnt that when Toby withdraws into himself it is best just to give him some space and peace so that he can deal with his stress and I just look for the signs that he’s ready to return to our world and accept a little gentle interaction. So, the good news is that he’s withdrawing into himself less frequently at school and is noticing more around him. He’s also discovering his own opinion and often makes it quite clear – most parents are familiar with this in a normally developing child as the terrible twos!

Anyway, due to this increased awareness school have decided to start toilet training. It could be a long and arduous process but it will be wonderful to ditch the nappies at last and to think that he’s moving towards some sense of independance. At home our main target is to tackle the issue of clothing and gradually build up to getting him to wear some! Issues with clothing are typical in autistic children and can include hypersensitivity to certain textures. Toby happily accepts wearing his uniform for school but at home he strips down to his vest and nappy. He also strips when we visit friends and family or even in an indoor play area. Again this is quite common with autistic children – they’ll accept something in one location and refuse it in another. It definitely needs tackling because although it’s perfectly acceptable for a six year old to wander around half naked, it’s quite a different thing for a 6ft teenager and the longer it stays a habit, the harder it will be to change!

So, I’m now on strip-alert and as soon as I see the clothes coming off, I rush to get them back on again quickly. I am not popular at the moment and it will certainly be a challenge!