Toby has never liked having his hair cut. In fact since he was old enough to need it, haircut time has been a source of considerable stress for both him and me. We've only ever attempted to have it professionally cut twice (and neither time ended well) so it has always been my job to do the best that I can to keep his hair at a manageable length. When I was at school, if someone had a particularly bad haircut we used to say "you lose a fight with a lawnmower?" and if Tobys classmates could talk I'm sure someone would have said this to him several times over the years, as I have not been a very proficient hairdresser.
At the weekend hair cutting time had arrived again, as it had got really long and Toby had to keep brushing it out of his eyes. I started off with my usual grab-and-snip technique, concentrating purely on not cutting him rather than the aesthetics of the cut. But because it was so long I was doing a worse job than usual so I decided to try the electric clippers H uses on his hair, just to neaten the back and sides. Toby really wasn't keen on letting me anywhere near him with this buzzing thing in my hand and it took both H and I to keep him calm and gently convince him to let me have a go – it did help him to see Daddy get a little bit of a trim too. The trouble with clippers though is knowing where to stop and with the sides and back really short the long top looked even worse, so the only way forward was to do the whole lot. There were a few moments when I thought we'd not manage to get his whole head done but eventually we were there and Toby went in the bath to rinse off all of those pesky little ends that always stick everywhere.
Anyway, the reason I am telling this story is not to recount my own part in it but to tell you about Tobys reaction to first seeing his new hair in the mirror. I so wish that I had filmed it and preserved the moment because he was so delighted and it was a wonderful, tear-jerking moment. He never takes an interest in his own reflection but when he saw himself in the mirror after his haircut he laughed and clapped and jumped up and down with delight. He's been positively preening ever since and he's enjoyed everyone telling him how handsome he looks. He even got to stand up in assembly and show the whole school his smart new hair. It's been so lovely to see him so pleased with his new appearance and watching him looking at himself in the mirror is priceless. I even managed to get one picture of him without his hands all over his face. I do so love my special boy x
little cotton rabbits 
Dearest Julie – I was clapping and crying, too!
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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That is joyous. And quite rightly too, he looks very handsome.
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Lovely photos, especially all together in a sequence. And an excellent job with those clippers! CJ xx
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That’s so amazing! And he does look so handsome!
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What a beautiful post. Toby looks great with his new hairstyle and the pictures are lovely too. How special to have him so pleased after all those difficulties over the years. X
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What a sweet story! And he looks great!
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He does look like a completely different person. He was cute before, but what a handsome lad now! Thanks for sharing it. Bx xxx
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Wow big boys haircut. Toby looks very smart (good looking lad). Lovely post Julie x
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Positively delightful!
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How wonderful. He looks so happy and you did a great job with his hair.
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Oh my, what a handsome boy he is !!!!
I can see why he is delighted 😉
What a bright day it must have been (in the end)
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How lovely to have had such a happy outcome. Lovely reward for his trust in you
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Wow, fantastic haircut. Toby looks great.
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You did an amazing job, very professional and he looks a very happy, handsome boy. Lovely photos!
Cathy x
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Fabulous pictures, especially the last one!
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Awe bless him, I can just imagine how precious these moments are for you Julie!
He looks great and can I just say, well done Mum, excellent haircut!
V x
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What a touching post. Toby looks great and very pleased indeed. Hopefully Toby will be able to relate to this new look (that he is very happy with) as a positive experience making future haircuts less stressful for you all. Lovely pictures. Thank you for sharing.
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Aww, what a fantastic hair cut! 🙂 He does look so pleased, doesn’t he? Congrats.
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Happy boy!
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I LOVE his new haircut! You can do anything…amazing mum that you are! I cut my boys hair too…always a leap of faith. My special Jack complains the whole time…grumbling his dislike! Toby looks amazing. You can see the joy in his eyes…bravo mum!!!!!!
As always, Lori from Port Perry
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Thank you for sharing this moment with all of us here on the blog. Such deep caring on your part helped him adjust to a new paradigm and possibly helped him turn a corner, at least as far as pride in appearance. You are so sweet and that’s why I’m drawn to reading your blog. There are many blog posts out there but there are few worth reading, but yours is always worth the time to read.
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It’s a great haircut! Thanks for sharing with us, he is very handsome!
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Oh Julie so fabulous and he does look very handsome, what a great hair cut!!!
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Looks fantastic! Great job. What a special moment for all of you.
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What a lovely story to start my day (I live in Australia). Julie you have done a wonderful job and the joy on Toby’s face says it all.
Bev
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It’s twilight here, and as I relax on my sofa, you’ve made my day. He is a handsome boy, and I like that haircut. I like thinking about his response to it, too. Beautiful.
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Lovely story and Toby looks great.
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Priceless…today’s blog made my day!! Toby’s pure happiness brought joy to my heart! Thanks and hugs to the both of you :))
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He looks fabulous! A friend of mine cuts her son’s hair (he also has Autism) bit by bit while he’s asleep! Takes her about a week, and he does look a bit odd for a few days, but it does seem to work.
Denise, also in Oz
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❤️❤️❤️
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Wow! Well done you! We’ve given up trying to cut Alex’s hair as it was just all too stressful for us all – I think on more than one occasion our neighbours probably thought we were killing him with all the screaming that went on! He cuts it himself now by lifting up “the long bits” and cutting them with his paper scissors. He now often sports some serious bald patches but he’s happy and we’re happy so life is good. What’s a few bald patches between family members anyway??? Beautiful pic of your boy …. they don’t happen often, do they? xxx
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The images that you shared with us are very tender and touch the heart. I know how a business that, for most people can be trivial, can be stressful for an autistic boy! I am convinced that from now on cutting the hair will be less tiring for everyone. The happy face of Toby is wonderful. Sending you all a hug in solidarity
Laura
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You can see the joy in his face. Priceless!
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What a beautiful story that brought tears to my eyes, you can see his happiness and they are such gorgeous photos of your gorgeous boy Julie x
Happy long weekend ….. may they be filled with lots of joyous moments too!
love Jooles x x x
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Oh Julie, that’s so lovely. I can’t believe how different and grown up he looks ( and handsome!). No wonder he’s pleased. I used to cut all of my boys hair with the clippers until they rebelled as teenagers. Now I’m back doing it again, when they are grown up. We try to do it in the garden so all the bits fly away. X
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so happy for him and you x
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Wonderful, just wonderful. And he looks so handsome!
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such a great ending!!!
So happy for Toby and you, too!!!
xxxxx Ale
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Toby – you look fantastic!
Well done Julie and thank you for sharing the moment with us. Can’t stop – got to go & get a hankie……
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What a wonderful picture. I’m loving the new look Toby 🙂
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he looks so lovely julie and happy
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Julie, my eyes are brimming with tears – what a beautiful post, and how happy and handsome Toby looks. Thank you so much for sharing these snippets from your life.
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Thank you for making my day with this beautiful, heartwarming story.
Reminds me of the first time I tried to cut my son’s hair with clippers, when he was 3 – he didn’t want to go to the barber’s after a previous experience, so I decided to have a go. I boldly (and, in hindsight, foolishly) smoothed the clippers from the nape of his neck across to his crown, then he screamed and screamed and wouldn’t let me near! It ended up with an emergency trip to the barber’s, after all, just as they were closing for the day, and they had to do the whole thing with clippers to repair the damage!
Maybe Toby will want a more regular haircut if he enjoys the outcome. Let’s hope so!
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What a gorgeous boy he is! And what lovely parents he has too! You did a really good job with those clippers.
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Amazing. So good to read Toby’s reaction to his new hair style. Here’s hoping the next time will be easier. Xx
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Julie, thank for sharing that heartfelt story with us! He looks adorable! ❤️
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Fantastic!!!
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Oh he’s just so handsome! My little man used to scream and thrash every time we sat in in the hairdressers chair. It was heartbreaking to witness, so I can totally relate to how overwhelmingly joyous it is when they finally make the breakthrough. I’m so happy for you, but more so for Toby. Wonderful.
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This is one of my favorite posts! He’s perfect! You did a fantastic job!
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Such a precious moment for you and Toby, Julie. Toby certainly looks very happy with his smart new hair 😀
Clippers are so much quicker and easier than scissors.
Your lovely boy is looking really grown up! xx
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Julie,
I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE how his hair looks. Clearly, from these photos, he does too! :o) I love his smile. He has the most GORGEOUS eyes!!! When seeing these photos, I find myself smiling back.
It really is the little things in life. Such joy! Thank you for sharing.
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You made a really good job of the haircut,especially as you say you had problems doing it!!! Well done and he does look good. Mazza
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Wonderful post! You can feel his joy! God Bless you all!
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He looks so lovely and happy! The haircut suits him fine! 🙂
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He looks so grown up! You’ve captured his joy completely. Thank you for sharing the joy with all of us xx
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Well done Julie. As a retired hairdresser you did a really amazing job. Toby is very handsome and looks well pleased with his new haircut. much love to you all.Janexxxx
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Boys and haircuts!! I had to learn how to use the clippers too. It takes a little practice to feel comfortable. I always thought I was going to nick and ear—or cut too much off. Toby looks happy with his haircut & so grown up. I know how hard day to day life is for you ( I have this life with my husband and sons with OCD ). It is not the life we may have chosen, but we must make the best of it. I think knitting & quilting have kept me sane through all the doctor appointments and school problems. Now I have my rest brother living with me. He has Cerebral Palsy. It is tough, but I am learning to be strong!!
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He really does look handsome!
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Fantastic haircut Toby.
I have been in the same position as you re haircut. When my son was little we used to have to trap him in his high chair until I wrote a social story. I was sceptical initially but it worked a treat. The dentist, on the other hand, wax a totally different story. It took me 5 years to get him to sit in the chair.
Well done on a momentous occasion.
Mandy Adams
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Loved the posting!! and loved being able to see all of him!!
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Supposedly a routine thing but what is usually a difficult task for you turned out to be a joy – who’d have thought! And he looks tremendous with his new hair! Well done Toby – and thank you to you both for sharing x
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I love the final picture of Toby (the small multi ones). He looks so pleased with his haircut. My ex sis-in-law cut her ex-hubby’s hair with the electric cutters but the guard thingy fell off and he had a bald patch for ages 🙂
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That is so lovely…I just love his smile.
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He is precious. Love his haircut.
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Just lovely Julie, thank you so much for sharing. I praise you and find you all inspiring in your journey with sweet Toby. Your son is so handsome and so sweet to see and hear he is so pleased with himself. He is very endearing, you are both wonderful parents and so patience.
Happy weekend to you, xoRobin
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What a great accomplishment. Toby looks fabulous! He should be pleased with his new haircut – he looks great. And you deserve to be one proud Mama. 😀
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P.S. I recently read this wonderful article about being a proud mama. It meant a lot to me to be proud of my son no matter his accomplishment. No he didn’t get into Harvard or split the atom or create world peace. His accomplishments to any other parent might be a normal activity – but to me they are huge.
I hope you like the article, too – http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2014/09/18/you-know-that-mom-who-isnt-joining-in-the-proud-of-my-kid-conversation-yeah-ask-how-shes-doing/
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Great job! He looks so handsome.
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Brilliant job Julie,and Toby you look so handsome x
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Looking good Toby! xx
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What a brilliant haircut and a triumph for you all too. I do hope that he will let you clipper his hair from now on since it made him so happy. I think you did a fantastic job!
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what a fab haircut and such a handsome boy.
now if i can just make my husband let me cut his hair…..
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Julie what a super job you did great haircut and Toby looks so handsome and grown up. well done
Hugs to all, we’ll do e Toby too!!
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He looks so happy!! And very handsome, you did a great job!
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What a smart handsome boy , well done to Mum for her patience .
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I loved reading about Toby’s haircut, such a precious moment for you and us reading about it. Thank you!
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What a lovely story Julie. The photos speak out and Toby looks absolutely thrilled. Brought a smile to my morning!
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Looking good! You’ve done a great job and his face is priceless. I wouldn’t have the guts to cut my children’s hair, so am really impressed with the job you did. Well done and thanks for sharing the story and pics…it’s a nice cheerful post on a gloomy Sunday morning (when I’m reading this!).
Dawnxx
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The last pic shows that gorgeous gleam in his eye. How wonderful to know that you put it there. What a wonderful Ma you are.
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What a beautifull, special boy! You can be proud of both of you!
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Wonderful story; wonderful haircut !
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Toby your such a handsome lad ….. Julie you did a great job of cutting Toby’s hair he looks totally trendy, happy and awesome reading your post and seeing how great Toby looks just ,made my day love to you all x x
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You are one very special mom, and Toby does look so handsome (and so grown up now)–what a beautiful smile. I hope that the pleasure of his new look makes the next haircut a little easier.
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He looks gorgeous – and so grown up ! xx
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Julie, he looks so delighted with himself!!! How wonderful for you!!! You are the sweetest Mum and I’m so glad he loves his haircut!!! He seems to have improved with the new haircut!!! Blessings for all of you!
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And you are one special mother! What a great leap forward.
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xxBeautifulxx
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Truly one of the most enjoyable posts you’ve ever done. Seriously, you did his hair? It looks fantastic! But, even better, his Toby’s joy! What a great memory for all.
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Beautiful picture and beautiful moment. Xx
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Well Done Mum !
He really suits that 🙂
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How fabulous and what a handsome young man he is with his new “do”. I recall my Mum cutting my brother’s hair in his sleep because he couldn’t bare the clippers or the scissors. If she tried to cut it when he was awake he always ran off so she’d be chasing him round the house cutting what seemed like one hair at a time. Thankfully he did eventually grow out of his hatred of the scissors but I think that was mostly because Mum found a mobile hairdresser he adored who eased him into “proper” hair cuts so very gently.
Hopefully next time Toby will be keen for a trim to keep up his new look 🙂
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Awww! 🙂
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Toby looks so happy. What a lovely set of photos. Thank you for sharing his reaction with us about his new and handsome look. I loved how the school had him stand up to show his new haircut. Maybe now it will be easier with the next haircut.
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Oh Julie how wonderful to see Toby looking so happy…he is a handsome boy…and so grown up! Fantastic post!
Jenni xxx
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Lovely post. He looks great! My 3.5yo hates having his hair cut…sensory overload, with the noise, the fluff, itchy scratchy bits, the water, the snipping… Toby has done so very well…and a deserved cup of tea for you x
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Utterly wondeful, I have a tear in my eye. He certainly is a handsome chap. Have a good week Julie xxxx
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Oh! He’s too wonderful for words!
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I loved this post best of all. Joy for all of you at having the haircut done, finally, and the haircut is terrific. Big smiles coming from me, too, all the way from Georgia, U.S.A.
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Julie
Your unconditional love for Toby is what’s really priceless! You should be so proud of yourself and Toby. Toby’s smile is lovely too!
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Oh – he looks great, and happy, different, he found out about himself –
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Hi julie,handsome boy!i hope he will remember how nice he looked when the next haircut comes up,maybe he likes it from now on.
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Hi Julie – what a great haircut – a very handsome young man!
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What a lovely post! I am happy to see Toby so pleased with his new hair style! He looks so surprised! you have done a fantastic job, and you and Toby will be looking forward to doing it again next time! Anne
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Ah, a fine lad. Just stopped by but will revisit again soon. Fantastic photos. Love the Misty Blanket. Thank you.
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Toby looks wonderful and the photos are priceless! Your post brought tears to my eyes. God bless you and yours, Bess
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That was a transformative haircut in more ways than one. Fantastic. I hope he keeps reliving the joy when he passes a mirror.
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Oh Julie! He’s just beautiful — what a lovely post — you’ve brought tears to my eyes. Isn’t it sad, that often a moment will occur and, too late, we wish we’d had the camera. I read a post on a photography blog years ago about just that subject. They suggested to write about the picture that would have been and putting the words in albums right alongside other photos. Your beautiful words will always bring that picture back to your mind’s eye!
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You did a fantastic job….your son is such a handsome fellow!! The joy on his face is priceless!
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Very handsome indeed!
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This is wonderful! I am laughing and clapping with Toby and jumping up and down and crying with you! Such a huge thing. I got this post. I’ve lived this post. This post resonated with me.
So monumental! All of it!!
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Sorry I missed this post about your beautiful boy. I got some tears in my eyes while reading. Such a wonderful kid.
Love from Holland!
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This post touched my heart. Thank you. I have a daughter with autisme too.
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He looks handsome and happy! Thanks for sharing this sweet moment in Toby’s life.
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Toby has the most beautiful eyebrows as well.
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